Daaayyuuummm, I really hope that that ain't true!

swimmerguy's picture

So, just a few minutes ago I finished Under the Banner of Heaven, by Jon Krakauer, and it was interesting.
I'll talk about it a little tonight, and a lot more soon, probably tomorrow night, when I'll post something interesting and thoughtful.
But tonight, I rant.

So, recently, I've just been feeling worse and worse. For like no reason. I've been feeling trapped.
Probably it's just more of that wonderful teenage angst we all come to know and love.
But I've been feeling like I wanna do an outburst like get on a soapbox in front of the school and just be like "HEY! I'M GAY! THAT'S RIGHT, I LIKE OTHER PEOPLE OF THE SAME GENDER!".
Because I think that at least some of the trapped feeling I get is because even though my friends are amazingly awesome and I love them all, most of the still do not know I'm gay.
And so, that leaves them open to talk about things that I can't, and leaves me open to many open conversations in which they talk about hot girls or who I like which are conversations I'd really rather not be a part of.
I'd really like to talk about how my stand partner in orchestra is uber cute and I always ask him for hugs but he rarely gives them to me... :P
So I just don't like that I feel trapped because I don't want to talk about something that to me is very insignificant, but that I'm afraid I might lose friends over because of stupid societal values.

AND SO, to deal with all this angst, and to cheer myself up, I decided to visit the Republican Party website.
Because Republicans are the funniest people on earth. Democrats are okay, for the most part, but I find it hard to agree with any Republican on any issue for any reason in any way at any time ever.
There's really not a single Republican I like.
And I think their devotion to phrases like "Judeo Christian values" is a good one, or another great word is "wholesome" (what does that mean anyway? "An activity that has the qualities of a whole?"), I think those things are hilarious.

Oh, here's a good one from their party platform: "To protect our
servicemen and women and ensure that Americas
Armed Forces remain the best in the world, we affirm
the timelessness of those values, the benefits of traditional military culture, and the incompatibility of
homosexuality with military service.
Hehehe... DOUCHEBAGS. I think "traditional values" are hilariously stupid.
And seriously, "the incompatability of homosexuality with military service"? Were they listening to themselves when they wrote that?
I would rather have some ripped, gay bodybuilder, like in that Vegas show Thunder from Down Under out there in our unrighteous wars than some straight fat computer code writer. Or Newt Gingrich, the largest cock in the world. Literally evil.

And it's rather contrasting to "The international promotion of human rights
reflects our heritage, our values, and our national
interest. Societies that enjoy political and economic
freedom and the rule of law are not given to aggression
or fanaticism.
Exactly! Except for the gays, of course, they don't count.

Oh, this is much to long to read all tonight. But I will have to. Tomorrow, perhaps. They have a section on continuing the war on drugs, a stupid venture of course.
Oh!, and look at this: "We consider discrimination
based on sex, race, age, religion, creed, disability,
or national origin to be immoral, and we will
strongly enforce anti-discrimination statutes. We ask
all to join us in rejecting the forces of hatred and bigotry
and in denouncing all who practice or promote
racism, anti-Semitism, ethnic prejudice, or religious
They VERY tactfully left sexual orientation out of their section insuring defending of our civil liberties and our constitutional rights!
When my school passes out it's little school book thing about rules and stuff, it says that they will not discriminate by any of those things they mentioned, but they put sexual orientation in there too! Which made me feel a lot better when I saw that at the beginning of the year.

And daaaaaaamn! : "Because our childrens future is best preserved
within the traditional understanding of marriage, we
call for a constitutional amendment that fully protects
marriage as a union of
a man and a woman, so that
judges cannot make other
arrangements equivalent to
I am so happy they haven't succeeded, because just the crap an AMENDMENT TO OUR CONSTITUTION like that would cause. That's why it wasn't put in there in the first place, guys.

Ooh: "A Republican Congress enacted the
Defense of Marriage Act, affirming the right of states
not to recognize same-sex “marriages” licensed in
other states. Unbelievably, the Democratic Party has
now pledged to repeal the Defense of Marriage Act

Ok, I have to stop, as much fun as this is to pull quotes from the Republican party to criticize, it's late, and I think you're getting bored of it anyway.
Oh boy, I am cheered up now!

Anyway, g'night all!


Yamamoto's picture

That makes me laugh so

That makes me laugh so hard... Homosexuallity being incompatiable with military service. Iseral has been kicking everyones ass in that region of the world long before we even 'attempted' to do so... and they let gays serve openly in there military before we did. :P I am sorry, but I am not seeing the incapability there. Oh and the same goes for the Britsh... :P

elph's picture

All... So true!

So much deception, linguistic trickery, boldfaced lies, pomposity, slaves to ideologies that enslave...

To see this truth requires no more than a brain that hasn't already been closed (purveyors of ideologies strive to make sure the door to the mind is glued shut once each victim's mind is theirs)... and, no more than just one functioning eye and/or ear should be quite adequate... :)


Ambition15's picture


Yeah same here on the republican thing. I've also had that soapbox feeling. It got to where I felt like exploding. The only thing that helped? I came out to one person. Then I had 1 person I could just talk to and rant to. Then later I came out to my family when I felt comfortable.

"First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they attack you, then you win." -M. Gandhi

elph's picture

About "Under the Banner of Heaven"

After reading reviews, this looks like a great novel that discloses the moral depravity that can ensue from unquestioning blind faith in an ideology (in this case, a religious sect)!

I'm inclined to add it to my long list of books-yet-to-be-read!

Was this an assigned book from school? If so, I'm very impressed.

HannahPajama's picture

You're right

Your stand partner IS uber cute ;D

swimmerguy's picture

I know!

I KNOW RIGHT! He's just, awesome. You should so tap that, he'd love you.


625539's picture

I'd really like to talk

I'd really like to talk about how my stand partner in orchestra is uber cute and I always ask him for hugs but he rarely gives them to me... :P


swimmerguy's picture


MacAvity's picture


You know, you would agree with what the Republicans have to say when it comes to money. Or, if you could find the Democrats talking about money, I expect you could have a bit of a laugh at that, though not nearly so good a laugh as you got from the Republicans.

Libertarian high-five?