How do I find out? Please Help

Seanzah's picture

Alright. This is going to sound majorly dumb... But I am so confused, and I need answers.

There is this boy. He shall remain nameless through this whole thing. ;)

He has been my friend ever since he and I join BoyScouts. We have always been back-to-back partners, always doing the right things, always the highest up teachers (as far as kids go) to teach the younger ones. We have always tented together.... and then there was this one night.

We had been hiking maybe 10 miles. Not much, but we were kind of worn out and a little tired, so we skipped dinner, telling everyone we were going to sleep. (This was at 9:30PM) So we went to our tent, and then got to talking.

At first it was harmless, and then it got a little exciting. After maybe 15 minutes of talking we got down to business, right there in the tent with maybe 30 other people within a half-mile radius.

After that things like that have been going on and off, sometimes one thing, sometimes another. I have once asked him to kiss me, but he refused, pulling his head away, and I could see on his face a look of slight disgust. Maybe he didn't like kissing... but then who didn't?

After maybe a week he started... changing. He would get a little more aggressive with me, a little more mean here and there. He would make jokes about me, make fun, and even when I did something harmless he would act as if it was the weirdest thing in the world. It's been two months since then, and we have only done a one-night stand. He's been acting like a total jerk, though, making me cry, and I hardly ever cry. I love him (Or as close to the real thing I can get without completely knowing) and I don't know what to do. I tried asking him if he was straight, bi, or gay... in a totally secluded area, and he automatically said straight and walked away.

He is hurting me, and I want to find out a way for him to come back to me, to make our bond put together again.

He has been going through a lot lately, though. Kidney stones, and those are rare for teenagers, and they hurt like hell. I have been trying to be a little nicer to him. If he punches me I smile and make a joke totally unrelated. When there are other people around I try and act straight so that he doesn't become embarrassed (I am kind of flamboyant), and it's irritating the crap out of me. Someone. Please help. ):

Comments

Dracofangxxx's picture

Down to business? Sexy time?

That's pretty open-ended... :P
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Amazingly offensive <3

Seanzah's picture

I know, haha. My friends

I know, haha. My friends told me that... but... idk

Gay Pride <3

Dracofangxxx's picture

Maybe you should ask him why he's so angry all the time?

Or why he went from being like your best bud into an enemy?
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Amazingly offensive <3

ferrets's picture

hmmm

interesting.

well, for starters, i though boyscouts didnt allow gays in it?

and furthermore, have you tried asking him outright why hes being mean to you?

it could have to do with him feeling ashamed about his sexaulity, and taking it out on you.

lasltley, i love your profile pic :D

"A loving man and woman in a committed relationship can marry. Dogs, no matter what their relationship, are not allowed to marry. How should society treat gays and lesbians in committed relationships? As dogs or as humans?"

Seanzah's picture

My Troop doesn't know I am

My Troop doesn't know I am gay. :D And actually, not that long ago I asked him why he was so angry all the time. He said it was because he was depressed. He doesn't really have any friends but me and two other girls. >.<
And thank you! Lol.

Gay Pride <3

swimmerguy's picture

Actually

As I recently found out, it's only strongly discouraged now. Gay scoutmasters and other adults have to leave, but there is no current policy saying gay boys can't be Scouts. Of course they might find another reason to discharge you :P

And as for everything else, I agree with da ferrets:P

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xt5ghXdq6Z0&safe_search=on

kamkam's picture

oh god

I've been through something like this. you think you love a person and you think they love you then they turn their back on you and pretend you never existed. sorry this is so depressing. I think you should forget about him and move on.

may the crests of light,love,hope,courage,and kindness shine brightly on a day.

Seanzah's picture

To be honest, I couldn't

To be honest, I couldn't leave him if someone gave me as much money as Bill Gates, told me the law didn't apply to me, gave me fivehundred servants, and a whole army. The only way I could ever leave him if one of us is to die. And that won't happen for a very long time.

Gay Pride <3

whateversexual_llama's picture

ok ok ok this is like

ok ok ok this is like classic homophobic gay boy behavior.

It's so common. A boy is gay but hates himself for it. So he lashes out at the gays around him (like you) to "prove" himself. He totally wants you (or at least, wants to be gay with somebody) but is afraid of what that means, so instead of facing his feelings he's being mean.

Here's the thing though- you may know he's gay and know he wants you, but it's NOT WORTH PUSHING IT. Guys who haven't come out to themselves run far too high a risk of become violent for you to pursue any kind of further connections.

You can be his friend and be there for him and hope that he'll trust you enough to come out. But if not, pushing it is just putting yourself in danger.

Seanzah's picture

That... pretty much sounds

That... pretty much sounds like him. :\
Always trying to prove himself as straight in the most obvious of ways. I love the way you worded that. Haha. Thank yew. <3

Gay Pride <3