FOR REAL

625539's picture

I'm actually fucking happy.

For real.

My boyfriend and I have not broken up, we worked things out. We're making an effort on both of our parts to just work out on the issues that have been bothering us respectively.

I don't know, I just woke up one morning and I was sort of like...

Even if things don't work out, sooner or later I'll be with someone else, and he's just not the person for me. But if things work then it's going to be amazing and beautiful and everything I've been bitching about since I started writing here.

And I've stopped taking everything so seriously, and being as insecure as I used to be. For real.

Today for the first time in about 3 years I smiled for no reason while sober. That sounds pathetic but I'm sort of like, wow, what the fuck is wrong with me? And then it's like : nothing at all.

I've slept soundly all week. Hell, I even smiled last night before falling asleep - I can't remember the last time I'd gone to bed feeling good about myself.

I'm happy in a FOR REAL kind of way. Without the nagging feeling of : Oh, life's coming up to throw me a shitstorm now since I'm happy.

For the first time.

Goodbye self-sabotage.

Comments

whateversexual_llama's picture

<3 this makes me so happy.

<3 this makes me so happy. enjoy the happiness to the fullest and it will last. ^.^

ferrets's picture

that is simply wonderful

that is simply wonderful :)

"A loving man and woman in a committed relationship can marry. Dogs, no matter what their relationship, are not allowed to marry. How should society treat gays and lesbians in committed relationships? As dogs or as humans?"

Dracofangxxx's picture

OH YOU~

I'm so proud of you <33333333
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That's redick!

radiosilence95's picture

Happiness.

It is a wonderful feeling <3

Grab as much of it as you can and stuff it in your pockets so it doesn't fade away!

jeff's picture

Sounds...

like a mature approach to relationships. As Dan Savage says, all relationships end, until one doesn't.

Life is what you make of it. If you choose to always arc toward happiness, it will usually bend to your will.

---
"Why be given a body if you have to keep it locked up in a case like a rare, rare fiddle?" - Katherine Mansfield

ShowMeLove's picture

This made me smile

I'm glad to hear things have turned around. :)

"Sometimes it takes another to show us the truths we hide from ourselves."
-Leliana, Dragon Age

Quietwarrior's picture

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Im glad you have found a new perspective :)

lonewolf678's picture

Great!

I'm glad you're doing better. :-)