So i came out to my mother last night. And it was well fine. For some reason i feel normal. Like when people say there is massive relief well i get that but i don't correspond to it enterally. But the outcome was good from my mum so that helped. She said she accepted it and would love me for whatever i am.
But the only problem she had was she kept saying how she doesn't want me to have a hard life. I said gleefully to her that if anybody insulted me more then just petty names then i would defend myself well. plus i want to work in fashion were nearly half of the guys are gay and plan to move down to London when i am 18. But then instead of saying "is this just a phrase, are you 100 percent sure you are" she went to say "Are sure that this is just not a fashion thing, like a trend". Now that got me a bit annoyed. I didn't like the fact that she thought i was wanting to be gay because it is more of the norm in the industry that i want to proceed into. But all in all we had a good chat and she said she wanted to say everything on her mind, then rather cover it with lies and then it come out bitter later on.
Never the less i was not planning on telling her yesterday night. I had spend all of the evening with my mum and dad and so when we got home very late me and my mum sat on her bed and talked. I kept thinking of my friends who had kept pestering me on telling her and then how other people on here had come out. Then i finally thought when am i going to find another perfect moment like this without all the hustle and bustle of my family coming in through. So i just did it
Though like i said before i do like my privacy and that has in honesty inflicted the outcome of me coming out. I feel more exposed now then i did before. It can be a good thing as i don't have to make lies all the time, but i liked the mystery of them not knowing in a strange way. Also my mum is someone who never trusts anybody but her family. Even to the point she said last night that she has never told any of her friends, even in school, who she fancied. I think now she feels that i will tell her all of my crushes and what so, which i may occasionally, but at this moment in time, it is easier to do it with friends. She got annoyed at the fact that i told my friends who about only two ( maybe 3 ) i trust who i fancy. I understand what she means about how friendships can alter allot, but sometimes you have to relax a little.