College is terrifying, and it hasn't even begun...

Nanook's picture

Within the past two hours, I've changed emotions faster than I thought possible. And I've alternated emotions so fast, I actually forgot what emotion I was feeling. Like, dude, I'm seriously terrified of college, and I leave for it in thirty-six hours.

I mean, sure, my college is thirty minutes away for me, but I'm not going home under any circumstance. Fuck that, I'm crazy enough as it is with my parents around all the time - I don't need to continue that for another four years.

But even still, it's college. I don't know anyone. ANYONE. I'm going from a class size of 89 to 2,000 something. That's at least 22x more people. And what if they all think I'm weird or smelly?! Or what if they find out I'm prematurely balding, although my hair loss seems to have halted?!

Or worse! What if I get drunk and embarrass myself?! Or what if I decide to get drunk and decide to smoke again, and suddenly have an asthma attack that requires emergency services? Cool. Suddenly room what-ever-the-fuck-I'm-in becomes asthma-kid room.

And speaking of my room... My roommate is UGHHHHHH! The kid is just plain weird. Not like, weird cool... But like weird... When he messaged me on good ol' Facebook, he told me he was a chubby chaser and asked about my fetishes. Just to put it out there, I don't care if you like overweight girls or guys. I really don't. I just don't need you to introduce yourself as a chubby chaser. I'm not particularly fond of "Hi, I'll be your roommate. I like fat girls. Do you have any fetishes?" Like, the fuck am I supposed to say? I umm... like guys that are really sexy. And I'm also vocal.

What's worse, he saw "Interested in Men" on Facebook and asked if it was a joke.... Like, obviously it's serious you flipping fool. Doesn't my profile picture scream, "I MOTHER FUCKING LIKE DUDES"?! (my profile picture is my icon. Rainbow flag. Legalize Gay shirt.) I mean, I told him I was gay, and he said he didn't care, but even still. Dah fuck?

Uhh... Maybe I should have opted for the University of British Columbia in Vancouver...

Comments

MacAvity's picture

Ergh...

Glad I have a couple weeks left before having to deal with anything similar... Good luck to you, mate.
The possibility of a weirdo roommate is a big part of the reason I opted for a triple room - figured at least one of them would probably be okay. I'm afraid that, to them, I'm going to be the weird one, though...

jeff's picture

Actually...

I keep wondering if things like Facebook will prevent college from sort of remaining a place where people can go to reinvent themselves. The stuff you're fearing is also opportunity. No one knowing you means you can be whoever you want. You can embrace your baldness or curly hair there. You can date guys with small packages. You can become a bigger fag (well, that would be difficult, hehe). You can change the entire way you present yourself. And on and on...

The stuff I'm curious about now is that your new college friends will soon get a chance to all virtually hang out with your old high school friends on Facebook and such. So, you never truly get to shut one world off anymore, as people used to.

---
"Why be given a body if you have to keep it locked up in a case like a rare, rare fiddle?" - Katherine Mansfield

Nanook's picture

Sorry, but I don't plan on

Sorry, but I don't plan on embracing something that's essentially you. A big ol' fag with a balding head and a small endowment. ; )

jeff's picture

Uhh...

i am NOT balding!

---
"Why be given a body if you have to keep it locked up in a case like a rare, rare fiddle?" - Katherine Mansfield

Nanook's picture

*A big ol' fag with a

*A big ol' fag with a receding hairline and a small endowment.

jeff's picture

Well...

I don't see why you're concerned with the size of my endowment. I mean, I'm no trust fund kid, but I do OK.

---
"Why be given a body if you have to keep it locked up in a case like a rare, rare fiddle?" - Katherine Mansfield

Nanook's picture

Is that what you say when

Is that what you say when the boys frown when they get personal with you? "I make good money...!"

jeff's picture

Uhh...

They already know that, cuz I'm paying them.

---
"Why be given a body if you have to keep it locked up in a case like a rare, rare fiddle?" - Katherine Mansfield

thoughtgoddess's picture

The roommate situation

The roommate situation sounds unfortunate.
Oh man, UBC has a lovely campus. I'm thinking of doing my Masters there. If it makes you feel any better, my cousin went there and he said that res was super-disgusting and tiny and not an awesome place to live at all.

lonewolf678's picture

College,

it's ok, I find it to be really laid-back. Maybe that's because I'm a part-time student (I'm not sure). But hey, this college things isn't so bad as it seems before you actually get into it. I wish you luck m8.

SometimesY's picture

I...

Just moved in today. I have three roommates in a room that was designed for only three people. It's tight. But they all seem nice enough. Yeah, I'm nervous about meeting new people but I figure it will be more exciting than sitting in my room on the computer all day. Two of my roommates are super girly and the other is a black girl (I'm not racist I swear) who I think is my favorite so far. It's weird being here because I spent so much time here with L last year but I'll get over it. It just takes some getting used to I suppose.

Good luck with everything! I'm sure it won't be as bad as you're expecting. *crosses fingers*