Confused and need help

artsguy's picture

I just want to start off by saying i’m new to this site and have never posted anything i go. I’m just very confused when it comes to my sexuality and i don’t really know what to think. I guess i’ve been contemplating it for a while but only this past year (my last year of high school) has it really presented itself as a major issue. I’ve been feeling increasingly anxious towards the latter part of my final year, and i was so sure it was just nerves for university. It came to the point where i knew i needed help to cope with it because i was getting panic attacks almost everywhere i would go. I started going to see a social worker and it’s been going pretty well.However, my sexuality has been lingering in my mind more so than ever these past few days,and i finally decided earlier this week i would tell my social worker. I figured it was in pure confidence and only good would come from finally sharing my feelings. I still can barely believe that i actually did it! I was sitting in the room and as awkward as it started out i knew i had to tell someone and she was that person. I haven't really thought so much about it but i do think i might be bisexual maybe even gay, although it’s hard to know because i haven't don't anything sexual or had any type of relationship with a guy or a girl for that matter. Anyways, i was so scared to say anything because i’ve never told a single person, but i finally just said that i think i might be bisexual. And her reaction was great. she understood and helped me out by referring me to this site. I know that it will take a long time for me to not only figure out exactly who i am and what i’m sexually attracted to, but to come to terms with it too. I feel a bit better that i finally told someone what’s been bottled up in my brain for a long time, but i’m also overwhelmed and still confused because i know i have a long road ahead of me and have no one i can really talk to about it. I’d love some advice of what to do next because i feel pretty lost. Even just talking to people that have or are going through this same situation or something similar would help immensely.

Thanks : )

ferrets's picture

well, ok, for starters

welcome to oasis :) always glad to have new people around.

as for what you should do next, that depends alot on your situation.

"A loving man and woman in a committed relationship can marry. Dogs, no matter what their relationship, are not allowed to marry. How should society treat gays and lesbians in committed relationships? As dogs or as humans?"

artsguy's picture

Thanks :)

Thanks for the welcome, and i guess i'm not really sure what my situation is right now, because no one knows except my social worker. But i have been thinking of experimenting once i go away to university. However, i'm not too sure how i'd go about doing that once i'm there. Like where to find someone and how to handle the situation with my friends that will be at University with me too.

elph's picture

Welcome from me as well...

Just do what comes naturally... and not inconsistent with your personality!

You're under absolutely no requirement to adhere to any preconceived pattern of what you may "think" others expect of you!

Just be comfortable being yourself!

btw... I'm one of the very few "elders" around here!

Yamamoto's picture

Yeah listin to Elph... he

Yeah listin to Elph... he always seems to have a really good head on his shoulders when it comes to these things, unlike others who may feed you falsed info that indeed based on those preconceived patterns...

Just do what makes you feel happy...

jayteebee's picture


I can honestly say I know exactly how you feel. I'm at the end of my final year at highschool now and feel the same way. I've come out that i'm bisexual to my closest friends and i'm in love with another guy for the first time in my life. It feels great. But challenging too. I'm sure he's straight so it gets me down sometimes.
ive got a forum topic with my story open, its called: "bisexual and in love with a straight boy" look at the list to the right ---->
we should totally talk cuz it seems like we're pretty much going through the same situation. i'd love to hear more about where you're at, and tbh, i'd love to talk to someone a bit more about my situation too. contact me at if you want to talk;)

artsguy's picture


i'm so happy there's someone else going through practically the same thing as me! haha. I read your forum topic, and i can completely relate and agree with everything you said, minus the falling in love with a guy (hasn't happened to me yet :P) But i hope that it works out for you, and i definitely admire you for telling him your feelings (if you decide to). I'd love to talk more :) , my hotmail is

jeff's picture

Just a note...

If these are unique e-mail addresses for Oasis, then that's fine, but if these are your standard e-mail addresses used elsewhere, you should only post stuff like that on your profile page here. Profile pages are not scanned by Google, whereas every other page can be, so if someone you weren't out to put your e-mail address into Google and landed here, etc., could be bad.

Just a heads up. We're not scanned daily (that I'm aware of), so if there is a concern, you can still remove it.

"Why be given a body if you have to keep it locked up in a case like a rare, rare fiddle?" - Katherine Mansfield

artsguy's picture


..i didn't realize google scanned pages. But luckily, i made this email address specifically for oasis. So i think i'm alright. Otherwise, like you said, that could have ended badly.

jayteebee's picture

hmmm I didnt know that,

hmmm I didnt know that, thanks. luckily I did make this email just for the website;)

PT's picture

Welcome to the site,

Welcome to the site, probably the most mature one you will ever get on. With time I am sure you will figure out who you are and what makes you tick.... just enjoy the ride along the way....

centerfielder08's picture

im always here if you want

im always here if you want to talk :) just send me a PM

centerfielder08's picture

PM---private message

PM---private message

artsguy's picture


thanks! it's nice to know i can talk to a lot of people on here. Feel free to PM me too if you'd like.

Meldiseus's picture

Hi ArtsGuy =)

This is my 13 day late welcome to the comunity post!!!!

^_^_^_^_^_^ Welcome To The Comunity ^_^_^_^_^_^

jasmineK's picture

I'm also new to the site..:)

I'm also new to the site..:) you can also PM me if you wanted someone to talk to.. I'm sure what your actually going through is pretty tough but don't worry time will come you'll get away with it and then find out who you really are..good luck to you dear..

Anyway I also wanted to share something with you folks,just recently I read an article saying that Two separate litigation have been filed against a proposed bill in Missouri that would cap rates of interest that payday loan loan providers can charge. No lender of any kind of loan, payday or otherwise, could charge more than 36 percent in the state of Missouri. Article source: Lawsuits begin over possible Missouri cash advance cap

elph's picture

Mildly(?) perplexed...

I'm curious to hear the connection you make between this cited news article and the general interests of Oasis' denizens...