secret

625539's picture

(i want someone to fuck me and i want them to want it. i'm sick of not feeling wanted, my boyfriend has no libido and i have been so fucking horny lately.

i've been fantasizing about my cinema teacher. he's older and not attractive in any way except that he's passionate about his work and he's eloquent. he's very sort-of "sexy ugly". he wears round glasses and i like them. he's into film noir and horror films which is also attractive to me. i feel like trying to seduce him.

and i don't know what that says about me. am i so insecure that i need sex that much to feel confident about myself? or has my relationship just gone downhill that much? or am i just keeping a whore locked inside of me?)

Comments

jeff's picture

Err..

Can't all three be true?!

---
"Why be given a body if you have to keep it locked up in a case like a rare, rare fiddle?" - Katherine Mansfield

elph's picture

Don't do it!

You'd be becoming as desperate as the now-discarded ephebophile who invaded your life a year+ or so ago!

You're a beautiful person in so many ways (a few "bad" habits aside)... take another look at all of those guys your age who were more than desirous of sharing your affections...

Do you truly know why they were rejected?

In the meantime, masturbate more frequently... and wake up each morning to a new day.

Also... can you be more explicit in describing exactly what you want... and what you can provide in exchange?

Affection (including sex) is best if all are equal...

625539's picture

I find guys my age boring,

I find guys my age boring, for the most part. Everyone wants the same things, it's simple. I love my boyfriend but things have been odd lately. Last year at this time I was going on dates with different people but they were such flat people...

As for what I want - I don't really want anything from my teacher but I think it would be interesting to flirt with him - more of a challenge, really. What I do truly want, though, is to see more desire/passion coming from my boyfriend.. We are "working" on it but it seems like the only sexual exchanges come from fights and I don't believe things should be that way. Regardless... I'll respond to your PM and you might be able to gleam more from there ?

elph's picture

Could it be...

...that your bf is genuinely fearful of not being able to truly satisfy all that you want... or, that you may not appreciate what his needs may be?

I think this requires an open and frank discussion.

Let him know that you want to be equals in everything you do. Ask him if he feels the same depths of frustration such as those torturing you!

He sounds like someone that you shouldn't risk losing! Compromise if necessary.

Have you asked him if he's ever had libidinal urges... satisfied either alone, in his fantasies, or with someone else?

PM would be welcomed...

625539's picture

He doesn't communicate his

He doesn't communicate his needs - thus, I have no clue. It's not like I don't try to understand, he brushes everything off and then we fight and make up, pretty much every month and I'm growing tired of it.

He knows about my needs and I do compromise and I keep it to myself mostly. It's just frustrating.