I've come to a conclusion about girls. Many of them like to be treated like shit. They do. I see it all the time, everywhere. This explains why I'm single. I'm too nice. I'm too sweet and caring and submissive. If I treat girls like shit, they'll like me. Am I being sarcastic right now? Sort of. Not entirely.
Let me share with you how I came to this conclusion. My best friend, once again, pushed me aside for some guy who (surprise!) treats her horribly. She promised we'd spend the day together yesterday. I hear nothing from her throughout the entire day. Finally, at around eightish, she texts me saying that she's all happy because she just spent the day with this asshole who's been a jerk to her and suddenly everything's great. She COMPLETELY "forgot" about spending the day with me.
Once she realized this, she apologized over and over again. I was really short and rude to her throughout our conversation. I think she deserved it. This wouldn't be such a big deal, but she does this ALL THE TIME. She gets head over heels over some random asshole and puts him before me. I have to listen to her rave about guy after guy after guy, I give her advice, I act happy for her, I play the role of the supportive best friend.
But it doesn't matter how much support I show, how much advice I give, how much I listen to her. She'll never appreciate me. Not only this, but EVERY TIME she says we'll hang out, we never do. Something always comes up. Always. And I'm tired of all this. I'm tired of being a doormat.
So I sent her one final text: "You like guys who treat you like shit. Maybe if I treat you like shit too, you'll like me more. What do you think?"
I'm glad I hurt her feelings. She needs to know what it feels like, to be pushed aside. I haven't spoken to her since yesterday. I'm waiting to see how long it'll take before one of caves and breaks the silence. And it's not gonna be me this time.
So yeah. This Christmas break has really not been fun. My best friend has yet again let me down, my cold won't go away, and I still have not collected the courage to text Brittany. Everything is a big ball of suck right now and I feel really, really alone. I just wanna crawl in bed and sleep the rest of break away. That is what I'll probably end up doing.
Sorry I'm being all mopey and depressed. I haven't felt like this in quite awhile because I've been feeling so optimistic and good lately, but emotional slumps have to happen some time, I suppose. I just feel like everything I'm going through right now I'm going through alone. I really don't have anybody, except for my best friend, and look at how that's turning out. Bleh.