I need to get laid. been sooo fucking horny lately...for too long. Sorry if that was too much, but i really need to fucking get over myself, and get a boyfriend. even if I stay in the closet, I need to fucking find somebody.
I guess I got a taste of sex and love/ lust w/ rick awhile back, and now I feel like I need somebody, even though I hate being gay, and don't think I can really ever accept being a fag.
on the holiday side of things, happy holidays, I guess. Holidays are hard for me, since i have had several frieends die and commit suicide during these times, and I know I have come close as well.
I also know that we have 14 people coming over for xmas, all family and extended fam...adn I am totally going go get the whole...why are you still single? Why don't you have a girl? nudge, nudge...convo...same as it is every year, but it will definitely be worse this year.
Last year, my brother in law's dad said some very homophobic stuff before the wedding, and it really angered me. i know he meant well, and was kidding with me, but it still pissed me off.
Just because he is a midwestern christian guy, and his family are all straight white christians, it doesn't mean that I am, or that I subscribe to their beliefs.
xmas will be fun. lol.