so yeah,

ferrets's picture

so yeah, i located an adorable gay guy at school before the break began. but i was unable to introduce myself, mainley due to my massive cowardice. becuase see, with girls, and straight guys, and gay guys who im not into outside of friendship, im rather confident. i can talk to them, joke with them, its all coolio.

but with gay guys im into, im a disaster. if i manage to say hello without hyperventalating, then i dont know what to say. i can get about this far into a conversation:
me: hello
gay guy who i like: hey
me: how are you today?
gay guy who i like: im doing pretty good. you?
me: yeah im doing ok as well.

and after that i dont know what to say to a guy i like! im worried if i open my mouth just the first thing i think will come out, and that would probabley be something like: iwantyoutotakemerightnowtoyourhouseandscrewmeinthefaceuntilyourhotcumshootsallovermyface

so how i found this guy i like, is, there was an assembley that we had right before we got out of school for winter break. and there was this really cute guy sitting right infront of us. the only things i knew about the kid was that he was adorable and a freshman. and my friend i was sitting with was also a freshman, so i figured they might know each other. so i lean over to her and whisper
me: hey, do you know anything about that guy? (points to him)
her(whispers): why?
me: just wondering...
her: you think hes cute, dont you?
me: wellllll yeah i guess you could say that...
her: well, i know hes gay
me: really!?
her: yeah

so my heart started pounding, and i was freaking out on the inside, becuase holy sit hes so cute and im gong to say hi then were going to be married in a month in a cathedral in london and then we will adopt five children, three boys and two girls, and raise them jointly with a lesbian couple, ad well have a redwood tree in our back yard, and ill love it but he'll always complain about it becuase it blocks our view of mt. st. helens, but inside he'll love it just as much as i, and we'll both cry when it gets blown over in a storm, and we'll grow old and four of our children will be moderatley succesfull, but the fifth will be a "author" who will never really write anything and will stay at home and live in our basment until hes 45, and then my husband will have a heart attack, and die, and i;ll be alone for 5 years before i have a stroke and am put into a vegtable state, then ethuanized beucae im like 84 and in a vegtable state, so why keep me going(thats what i would want to, to be put to sleep rather then to just sit around for a few more months or however long until i have some other complication to die of)

ok, so maybe thats not quite what i thought, so close enough. but so yeah, i was getting really excited, but i decided to check with additional i lean over to the girls on my other side
me:hey, do you know that guys name?
her: yeah, his name is (you stalkers dont need to know his name!). hes queer you know. i think he would like you
me: im oging to try to court him
her: good for you
so yeah, i made this epicley romantic plan of how i was going to introduce myself to him, but instead i jsut got nervous and jittery, and just followed him weirdly throught the halls until he left the school, after the assembley.
so yeah, im going to try to talk to him again after break is over. i need some help, guys. what do i say to him!? i need to preplan it. i would greatly appreciate advice, since none of my friends have given me any besides "be yourself" which means fuckall, becuase being myself could range from giving him a hug to trying to play D&D with him.
so yeah, i was going to write about other stuff, but this post is reaching a stupid amount of length, so ill write about that other things some other time.


Yamamoto's picture

Just be gald you have

Just be gald you have someone that your into and be happy about it... and instead of whining just do what you need to do and get to know the guy and ask him out on a freakin date... god damn don't be such a fucking pussy... you could be like me and have no one to ask out on dates, hell you have gays guys your 'not into' to talk to... so don't fucking complian and don't fucking be a pussy and do what you fucking got to do to go on a date with this mo fo :@

swimmerguy's picture

You see...

When someone's talking, they ain't always talking directly to you...

Yamamoto's picture

Just go fuck yourself

Just go fuck yourself asshole. I was just trrying to reply to a journal and you just attack me for no reason...

swimmerguy's picture

Fuck myself?

How do I do that?

Hehe, anyway, I wasn't attacking you, I'm just pointing something out. If a lesbian wrote a journal about this girl that they really like and want to approach I wouldn't be like "Ewwww, why would you be attracted to this girl? Vajayjays are nasty man!".

In other words, I'm pointing out that in your "reply" you're overly critical of Matthew, because you're judging his experiences based on yours.
Say I'd had sex a billion times with a ton of different guys, and then someone had a journal about their first time and how great it was, I wouldn't leave a journal based on my experiences, Only one fucking time? Get a life you skanky fucker!!!, I would congratulate them for their first time, rather than being overly critical simply because I've done more than them.

I wasn't "attacking" you at all, I'm trying to point out that not every journal is talking to you, they're talking from someone else's viewpoint, and to judge it and be overly critical based on your own experiences is a mistake and is in fact rather mean, whether you realize it or not.

Yamamoto's picture

Uhmmm how in the fuck do I

Uhmmm how in the fuck do I do that... all I have is my own very point... thier is really no othher way in the word for me to make jugdements? I am sorry, but I just don't understand thier viewpoint... the only one I really understand is my own :( I am sorry, but I just have only point I can give a judgement form... sorry that I am not a 'normal' human being like the rest of you assholes :(

swimmerguy's picture

Well, for starters

Never chew someone out for having things you don't. That's never a fair criticism to make.

You appear to be criticizing Matthew here simply for having guys to like that might like him back, while you say you don't. So? That's not his fault.
If a kid is the child of a billionaire, the kid of a single poor working mother should have no reason to hate him necessarily, simply for having more things than him, it's not a fair criticism to say, if that billionaire child's father died "Jesus, you fucking pussy. I never had a father, just suck it up, you little fucking bitch".

See, that's not a fair accusation to make. Can't you at least objectively understand how other people see things?
Oh, Matthew has a cute gay guy he likes, he must be excited, rather than you getting really pissed at him because you don't have that.

Yamamoto's picture

No frankly I don't see it in

No frankly I don't see it in any objective manner really... all I see is red...

He has somthing that I would kill for... somthing I would die for... and it is somthing I will never be able to fully have in the way he has. For me dating is limited to the internet, and I have fully come to the relization that is the only way I am going to find someone is through the internet...

So frankly every time I see this, trust me when I say I will see red becuase it makes me more angry and jealous than anything... and no I don't undestand how he sees things... becuase all I see is red.

So I will give him as much criticism as I fucking want to...

swimmerguy's picture


You see, I ain't exactly an expert on courting guys either, so I really don't know what to tell you.
What you need to do is make a commitment to yourself, and to keep it. You can't make the decision spur of the moment, you need to have the decision made before you see him.
For example, make a commitment like "Next time I see him, I will walk up to him and say hi", maybe get friends to come with you. But really, be your charming self, I know you said it doesn't help, but it does, once you make the commitment for what you're going to do, and then you follow it, you won't be as nervous as you think you will :P
And afterwards, make a commitment like "I'll get his phone number next time I see him", like I made for CAG, and you have to keep it, or it cheapens your word and you're less likely to do it next time. I delayed a few times from getting his number, but eventually I decided "Fuck it, I'm getting it", then I asked for it, got it, and it wasn't nearly as bad as I thought, he didn't appear to think it was weird at all...

So, I don't think you need a script, I think you just need to make the commitment beforehand, decide that you will talk to him, the decision is already made, and then go do it, and you'll feel a lot better once you've already made the first step of approaching him, I promise :P
Good luck hun :P

matt323's picture

Practice makes perfect!

Practice makes perfect!

elph's picture

I have to comment...

...but time is limited right now as I must get on the road.

Just to let you know, however, that your experience is the bane of nearly every gay teen (other than for those few who are after nothing but sexual conquests).

I'm hoping this can work out... you deserve him. And... I hope... he, you!

socialist's picture

Shit! I don't know!

Welcome back, by the way. Anyway, I have no idea how to tell him about what you think of him, but I think that comes later. For now, just talk to him. I used to get nervous around Brad, but now I just talk to him.I is difficult at first! I have nothing to tell you here; you just have to do it. As for communicating with him outside of school, I don't know because I was lucky enough to get his phone number for a school project we were doing together.
Thinking about BJs while talking to him... I'll never understand "regular" people. I keep sexual feelings seperate from romantic ones. Actually I feel sort of jealous of your sexual thoughts, though I have no idea why. Anyway, what I think when I talk to Brad is more like: iwantyoutotakemerightnowtoyourhousesoicantellyouhowifeelandyoucanhopefully

HELEN-_-'s picture


haha u go man! ive only been knowingly lesbian for a couple months and if u found a guy that's gay and u like him.. seriously be yourself but practice being yourself. thats the ABSOLUTE BEST advice i have ever gotten from a friend.. good luck man!
-Helen was here :P love u :)
P.S. you asses that r fighting over comments.. CALM THE CRAP DOWN. this isn't your prob that we r discussing :)

Yamamoto's picture

Why don't you mind your own

Why don't you mind your own busniess :@