I have recently graduated college. i left home knowing who i was four years ago, but now i have returned to my home town and i must face what i ran away from. I recently moved into a house owned by my parents with a sibling (he knows whats up). I fear what my parents will think, having close calls before, knowing what they think about the subject. Which is extremely negative. If it were up to me i wouldn't tell them for a long time. I wanted to at least get a big girl job, be on my own (the house i am living in i am hoping to not be there for longer than a year) but i have developed some sort of anxiety, pressure in my chest, numbness, etc. I even went to the ER thinking something was wrong with me, only to be told that it was all in my head. Yes i have been dealing with a lot of pressure-stress, dealing with school crap that i don't even want to get into, but i did it and i am done with that (my parents think this is what i am feeling sick). I sat and wondered why this is happening (i can't even drive without hyperventilating and forcing myself to push forward, but i don't know how long i can handle doing this to myself) when it hit me. I feel so much guilt for keeping this from my parents. You see, they are helping me out saying 'don't worry about rushing into a job until you are better' as they are telling me this i say in my mind 'well only if you knew you wouldn't be doing this for me' I feel like a liar, and i have been avoiding this for 5 years, but now my body is failing me. i feel disabled. how can i get a job if i can't even drive myself to the interview? i fear so much, but i feel like it isn't much of a choice anymore for me to keep this from them. my girlfriend who lives where i went to college is scared for my health and is trying to get me just to tell them, but she doesn't understand how my parents are. if i tell them and shit hits the fan, then what? more stress, more anxiety? where will i live and if worse comes to worse, they may take the car from me that they gave me years ago.. etc etc, thoughts are endless. I know i must expect the worst scenario. any thoughts on the subject?