That skanky bitch, she fucking cut off all my hair

swimmerguy's picture

Well well well, my friends.

I've been in Idaho for the past however many days. It's kinda depressing there, really. We were visiting my aunt, and her 7 year old son, and my grandparents. They're a bit of a mess, really...

I won't go too much more into it.

But, we did, in Idaho, visit a hair place to cut my hair. About my hair, I of course swim a lot, so however much I use swimmer's shampoos and conditioners and the like, it gets dry, and gets really poofy and wavy and blonde.
So while it's pretty cool, I think, while shorter, it eventually starts to get out of hand, as it has recently. So we were going to get it cut.
So I go into this place and I'm like Okay, leave the top about 1.5-2 inches, and the sides a little shorter than that, and she's like Okay, so 1.5 inches LEFT?, then Ya, right. 1 and a half inches LEFT.
And then she's all LOL K HURRR DURR and practically buzzes the whole fucking thing off, my family keeps telling me I look like a Marine now.

It's just so frustrating, I mean, if my hair's an inch on top, I'd be surprised, and the sides are practically stubble.
Oh, and when she was done, and we'd driven away a bit, my mom looked at me for the first time and all of a sudden noticed that my bangs were ragged as all fuck, with parts like 3 inches long, with others under an inch, so we had to GO BACK and get another stylist to actually cut the bangs that time.
My God, and then my family keeps fucking teasing me about it, and they keep fucking bringing it up again and again and again and I just ugh,
Fucking pissing me off. Fuck Fuck Fuck.

Anyway, on our way back today, we stopped at a restaurant, and there was this really cool waiter who said that he taught Ichiro (A baseball player from around here) to say What the FUCK?! East Coast Style.
I thought that was pretty FUCKING AWESOME this waiter at this semi-fancy restaurant would tell us his stories in profanity and baseball...

Other than that, I go back to school tomorrow. About fucking time, I say. It's miserable hanging around the house around my parents here all the fucking time.
And I get to see CAG tomorrow. But my hairs all ewwy. I'll wear a cool cabby hat...
I want to give CAG a late Christmas or New Year's hug or something, just a hug. I'll see how he takes it :P

Anyway, I wish I was born later than I was.
I saw this Morgan Freeman: Through the Wormhole thing about What would Aliens look like?, and I found it fascinating as all fuck.
I mean, to think that somewhere else, far, far away, on a world we can't comprehend in some other galaxy or something, there might be other forms of life, perhaps they speculate too about the possibility of life on other planets. Perhaps they're not as intelligent as us, perhaps they're far more intelligent.
But that got me thinking about all the incredibly interesting things that must be in the universe, how vast it is.
There's this planet that's really close to it's sun, and so it's hot, but it has a really thick atmosphere, and they think it has a lot of water, so the planet is basically covered by water, but since it's hot and dense, the water turns into steam and condenses, so there's a big band of water/steam, where it'd be like swimming through something that's half gas, half liquid.

Anyway, I could have been born in like 1200, when science was forbidden, and the only thing you could know about the cosmos was by looking up.
But I was born now, and I wish I was born later. Because I can only ever know what humanity discovers before my death.
I've thought I never really wanted to live a whole long time, but I feel like I do now, because I want to know this shit, this awesome, weird things they figure out about the universe, and if we ever discover extraterrestrial life, which I think we will, I want to be there to see it.
Oh my God, why are people all into religion, what's the point in thinking you already know all the answers?
Isn't it a lot more satisfying to know that you don't know all the answers, but you're going to try to find all the ones you can, and the real awesomeness is in the wonder, the imagining what else is out there, and then actually finding out what it is, I think that's wonderful...

Ugh, people are stupid.
Like, look at this shit: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Black_hole
Isn't that fucking fascinating? Singularities and shit?
Why the fuck would God be better than that?

No, the Flying Spaghetti Monster's where it's at, look at this awesomeness:
http://www.venganza.org/2011/01/gay-marriage/

Comments

elph's picture

Is there just a remote possibility...

...that years of not-too-subtle taunts are slowly sinking in? Osmosis, maybe?

There's so much out there lying in wait for such a receptive mind... Cosmology is just one of the many challenging possibilities! And more are springing up daily (what about those ftl neutrinos... really?).

Take all of the math available to you... You're up to the challenge (right?)!

And avoid math teachers (like in 8th grade) who inform you unequivocally that there is no procedural (i.e., simple paper/pencil "math") algorithm for solving square roots! (Do you want to see how?... I fully acknowledge that such devices are now relegated to impractical "curiosities.")

lonewolf678's picture

Dude,

I can't even imagine how that must've been having your hair screwed up. I know I'd be just as angry as you if it happened to me, but my last hair-cut was in '07. lol

socialist's picture

I've posted the same gay marriage link...

I've been a Pastafarian longer. Anyway, I would be a lot angrier than you are if that happened to me; I love my hair (which is why I get it cut at fancy places like a homo). And I believe you meant "herp derp", not "hur dur".
I believe I know all the answers. I used the religion lad in my brain to fuse Taoism and Buddhism when I couldn't sleep and I started thinking deep thoughts. I also added more once in a deep conversation with some people in my English class when we didn't have any work to do and spent the entire class talking.

elph's picture

Check your dictionary...

I think both expressions exist... and both are equally lacking explicit content:

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=hurr%20durr

:)