Things seem back to normal...


My daughter and I are back to our usual selves! Laughing, joking, playing around, shopping... just like old times. We havent talked about the whole gay thing... because like I said in my last journal, Im DONE bringing it up. I love her so much... and hope things stay this good between us. Call me crazy... but I think this whole gay thing might just be a faze for her? Maybe her way of getting attention? Im not down-playing her homosexual feelings or anything... I just feel that this whole gay thing will blow over one day.



hellonwheels's picture

Glad things are back to normal...

FYI, they always were. Being a lesbian should never change the way things are between you or her. She is the same person she was before you found out that little bit of information from her therapist, and she will be thaat same person in the future. Granted, we all change, that is a constant part of life, but she is still your daughter, and I am sure she still cares for you the same as she did before you found out the information you did.

Maybe she is one of those rare kids to whom it is just a phase for attention of boys or family or whatever, but there are definitely those for whom it is not something they consciously chose, or can simply grow out of. Case in point, the Mormon church's attempts @ Brigham Young University back in the sixties and seventies to 'shock' the gay thoughts out of students there...It didn't work because it can't work.

Mental wounds not healing, driving me insane, i'm goin' off the rails on a crazy train- the ozzman

jeff's picture


I wouldn't count on sexual orientation blowing over. Most kids don't go for persecution and discrimination as the default ways to get attention. Your best hope is she's bi and ends up dating a guy, but any thinking like that is ultimately negative, since you are creating a future in which you would be more comfortable with her.

The good news, that state can exist today! The main difference will likely be that in your hopeful thoughts, she changes. The reality is, if you want to be happy and completely accepting of her, she won't be the one doing the changing.

Listen to this like it's your daughter addressing you:

"You can judge the whole world on the sparkle that you think it lacks" - Dawes, When My Time Comes (

MaddieJoy's picture

I'm an attention hog and I

I'm an attention hog and I used to think I had tricked myself into thinking I was bi (I have been known to convince myself of some weird stuff) for attention--but now I know no one would do that. If I were going through a phase or trying to get attention, I would find a way to od it that didn't make me freak out whenever I think about being outed or discriminated against. Being gay or bi is a really scary thing in today's world. If your daughter says she's lesbian, she is. No one in their right mind would lie about that.

"It's a helluva start, knowing what makes you happy."
--Lucille Ball

lonewolf678's picture


seeing as a pretty good number of the United State's population is of the LGBT-et cetera variety, the hope for it being a phase isn't too productive for you or your daughter.

stillgotlegs's picture

Not having talked about it

Not having talked about it for a while doesn't mean it's gone away. Your laughing and joking may be taken by her as, I don't know, that you're ok with it?

She feels more secure, thus doesn't need to talk about it further. She shouldn't have to remind you every ten minutes that she's gay!

“Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?”