Obscurity

lonewolf678's picture

So yeah despite what I've wrote the past few times I've been here, things are going fine. But I'd like to write about something that definately interests me. It's something I'll probably always wonder about and not that there's resentment. Now let it known that those who know where I had come from that I resent nothing but my inner curiosity is aflame.

Upon discovering when I was adopted (only a three days after I joined here), It recently came to mind, "who am I?". Not that it's much to think about, just what my learners licence and SSC tell me. Sometimes I wonder if I'll never know and leave it at that, or (and this gets weird) if predestination landed me here by the hand of Allah.

I wonder truly, am I just this man here by coincidence. Either side, the less confusing being coincidence is okay if that's how it is. But I wonder what is my heritage, simply Mexican, or maybe something else. As far as I know my facial features and other attributes seem far-off from the more familiar way people look.

I'm not critisizing Allah's plan, nor my circumstances. But I tend to wonder. Sometimes I really wonder what this place is. Earth is such a beautiful place truly. But I wonder what other places there are. For truly I sometimes feel so out-of-place. Not that I feel like a reject, or outcast. I blend in fine, I mix, I play significant roles sometimes.

But I wonder, maybe I'm just the crazy thinker. Because it's not hard for me to believe there's a place where everyone gets along, a place where war isn't even in a dictionary but in a book of philosophical ideas. Then I wonder if I'm thinking of Paradise, then I call myself a fool for thinking that maybe I'm supposed to be somewhere else.

Maybe I'm not the only one to wish to live in a place like that. Maybe I'm the only one writing it down. Maybe I need to forget it and march on. Maybe I'm the one who's wrong.

Comments

Yamamoto's picture

We can talk about this in

We can talk about this in PMs if you want lonewolf?... I think I can help or at least be a good person to talk about this with... :)

lonewolf678's picture

Someday,

but I'd have to feel that way again. Thank you for considering. :-) I'm good now.