How to stop your boyfriend from dealing and taking drugs?

DarkestValley's picture

Just a note:
Jake* I swear to God, if you ever come across this journal, I will resent you for the rest of my life.

The things I want:
Jake to stop dealing and doing drugs.
I WISH jake was a virgin.
I want him to get a qualification and be somebody not some no hoper bumming around without any job or qualification or anything.

Fuck, i'm a bitch.
How does he put up with me...
Anyways how do I get him to stop dealing drugs and taking them. It's so scummy!!!!! And I want me to stop getting shitty at it and I want him to stop getting shitty and me getting shitty at it, and thinking im "controlling him." Erhhhhhhhh

Comments

jeff's picture

Well...

You don't get them to stop, really. You encourage them to stop. You offer them support. But until he wants to stop, it's not going to happen. Does he indicate he wishes he could stop?

You probably only need him to stop doing drugs, and dealing will happen at the same time. Usually dealing pays for the doing.

As for wanting him to be a virgin, get over it. He's not. People have lives before they meet you, sometimes involving sex. If he wants to be with you now, that's sort of the end of it. Relationships are better with more mystery, less history.

And you're obviously not controlling him... you just wish you were ;-)

---
"You can judge the whole world on the sparkle that you think it lacks" - Dawes, When My Time Comes (http://youtu.be/Z0FrcTX6hWI)

Dracofangxxx's picture

"I'm a bitch"

yeah pretty much

you have to realize people aren't YOU. They aren't going to do what you want, what you would do, or what you like. That's not how relationships are supposed to work and it's an abusive thought. If the drugs aren't impacting the relationship or his wellbeing or health negatively, then there is no need.

I suppose you should also stop drinking coffee and soda if you hate all drugs or something.

Basically, though... You gotta get over people. They're not your toys, they're people; they lived lives w/o you and if you try to make them change (which you absolutely can not do), they will go on and finish living their lives without you.

Love = two people putting up with each other's bad traits because the good outweighs it. I guarantee you that you will never find a perfect guy. Even if you did, you'd find ways to bitch and moan about him because that's how humans work. Instead, learn to deal with the bad. If he never asks you to change anything- guess what! It's not because you're perfect, it's because he knows your bad traits aren't bad enough to be worth arguing over or leaving.
-
That's redick!

Uncertain's picture

Instead of changing almost

Instead of changing almost everything about him, find someone else with those qualities?