The novelty of being a senior has worn off. I don't want to go to school another 170-something days now.
People suck soooo much. The main instance of this is my government class. Oh, my stupid fucking government class! They provoke the teacher by constantly interrupting her and drawing gross pictures, and then they wonder why she's such a bitch. I don't have any friends in government class. I have some people in there who I think are okay, though. Like, there's this one hot girl in there, for example. Also, Friday she was going on and on about how this other hot girl was super hot. Sadly, she is not gay, but merely appreciative of hotness... But it was still super awesome because that's like taboo in this super lame town, so I never get to hear hot girls say stuff like that.
On the bright side, I just did my calculus homework, and even though it's just review stuff now, I did it right! There were numbers and I wasn't scared! YAY!
I started to feel even worse about physical science after I saw who some of my classmates were, but now I am 99% sure I have made a poor decision. It's a fucking joke so far! Brat could have done all the work so far, and she's only in fourth grade! It's still not too late to switch, but physics also has to be for a college credit, so I know if I make a big fat C- in physics, which, knowing my limitations, I more than likely would, that would be an even bigger mistake. I keep asking anyone whose opinion I value if it's better to be the best at physical science or the worst at physics, and my mom says the former, but no one else has a definite answer...
My dad is being a huge buzzkill. I rarely ever see him, but I did on Saturday, and I mentioned how excited I was to be almost finished with high school. He said, "But then you have to go to college, which sucks, and then you have to go to work, which sucks. Everything will always suck." Wow, Dad, speak for yourself, but I'm not doing any of those things in this dead town. My life is not going to suck... I mean, I know his perception is skewed because he has lived in the shittiest, most boring town in America for 44 years, but come on, why so negative? Of course working is gonna be boring, but "everything" is not going to suck because I will be away from here.
Also, college applications are going to give me an ulcer or some shit. I can't even look at the Common App website without feeling nauseous. I only know two people who have been through this, and I only have the phone number of one, but it's not like I can call her every single time I think about applications and start crying because I'm overwhelmed. See, most people I know only apply to one college. It's rare that someone around here even bothers with a different school than the one their family has always gone to. Every year, there will be a very small number of people who do something different, all usually in the very top of the class. There were four or five this past year, which is the most I've ever heard of. Including myself, I think there will be three in my class, maybe four depending on what IG does. I'm so scared to start the applications, and the only condolence I have is the fact that I'm getting out of here no matter what. I don't know who to talk to. I don't know how to talk to the counselor because I never really had any contact with her before. Maybe I will go to my English teacher first and then set up an appointment with the counselor.
I don't know what to write my essay about. Any of my significant experiences either make me sound like a petulant little girl seeking sympathy or are probably done (much better) by other people thousands of times a year. I mean, I haven't had a totally horrible life or anything. I've always had all of my basic needs taken care of, don't get me wrong, but honestly, anything significant has been a little negative. Seeing all the abject failure around me has definitely forced me to become SUPER driven, though. I guess that's a plus. Maybe. I don't know how to write about that without sounding pathetic. That's probably done often, though... I don't have anything unique.
It's sinking in that I'm not going to go to college with my best friend, and it's super weird. She doesn't want to go to any of the same schools as me. Like, we have done almost everything at school together since 9th grade, with the exception of foreign language and a couple of electives. It's already a shock enough to only have a couple of classes together this year. It's going to be soooo weird...
In other news, this isn't really relevant, but it's too delicious not to share. I'm sure you all remember FCG. Well, watching this girl try to use social networking sites is like sipping from the Holy Grail of Stupidity. Don't get me wrong, I want the best for FCG. I hope she finally accepts herself and finds a girl who looks like a Victoria's Secret model but is actually a world-class chef (she said she wanted somebody who cooks, but alas, I could only boil water) who shares her affinity for hair-touching and thinks her simplicity is as oddly charming as I did. She's dumb in a cute way, yes, but she's still REALLY freaking dumb.
So, to my point now. You remember how FCG sulks and cries when people disagree with her or she turns out to be wrong, which is basically always? You remember how she never makes any sense when she argues? She posted recently that she has decided to become... A LAWYER! I cannot think of anyone, and I mean ANYONE, less suited for that job than FCG. Sure, she loves to argue, but she is the WORST at it. Just because you are blonde does not mean you are Elle Woods, FCG. That movie is not a documentary. FCG trying to become a lawyer is like me saying I want to teach organic chemistry to babies.