-They say that you become what you pretend to be. Does that mean if I pretend to be fine, I'll be fine?
-If you rely on everyone around you for genuine happiness, prepare yourself for some disappointment. If you rely on one person for genuine happiness, you're totally fucked.
-Even in my worst times, at least I knew what I was thinking and feeling. I've always been able to sort through my thoughts, interpret them, analyze them. I could always bring clarity to what I was feeling, even if that feeling was overwhelmingly negative. Now I can't do any of that. Confused, nameless thoughts and feelings do not sit well with me.
-She's definitely the kind of girl who walks around every day completely oblivious to how beautiful she is. I wish I could tell her. There are a lot of things I wish I could tell her. Boundaries. I have to remember my boundaries. Always reminded of my boundaries. That's all my life seems to be right now. Boundaries and limitations.
-I've been learning about Buddhism in my World Lit class. I love it. I've been reading up on the Eightfold Path and the Four Noble Truths. I wish I could live by these things, but I don't know how any modern human can.
-I am easily forgotten. This statement is not a solicitation of sympathy--it is a simple, undeniable, unwavering truth.
-I found the perfect Christmas gift for Brittany, but it's an obscene amount of money to spend on one person: 102 dollars. I'm not trying to buy her loyalty or love or anything, although it seems like that. I just really want to get her something special. This is what it is: http://fineartamerica.com/products/tardis-john-lyes-framed-print.html
Adding the other three gifts I'm getting for two other friends and my sister, I'm spending almost two hundred dollars on Christmas gifts. My two friends don't really deserve anything, but it's our last year together and they're fun to be around, so why not. Maybe I'm buying all these gifts to make myself feel better.
-I plan on giving Brittany this gift when I invite her over to my house some time over Christmas break. I have visions of us playing in the snow, maybe snowball fights and sledding. Then I'll give it to her when we go inside for hot chocolate. I have no romantic intentions hidden in this plan. I just want it to be special since she's my closest friend and all.