My Lidfe is ruined....

DWalk93's picture

Im happy beinf the black bisexual male that i am yeah.....but i finally got the courage and even through the stutterung i tolld my mother and my oldest sister and thet spazzed out on me they were like i knew u were a faggit you like wow all i could was cry i swear those are some of the most hurtful s
Words ever especially from your mother.


ElsaGabor's picture


Well I didn't see this before I commented on your last post. This will all pass, don't allow anyone to knock you down. It's hard, but all of us have gone through it at some point; you really aren't alone. As terrible as the things your mother may have said, I can assure you she stills loves and cares for you. This is hard for her too, and she's just as hurt and upset as you are. Everyday is a new day, and with the passing of each day it will slowly but surely get better.

DWalk93's picture

I understand this i do, but

I understand this i do, but what i dont understand is she knew all aling according to my 2nd oldest sister yet she says that and makes me feel like less of a human being than i already was see this is the type of stuff that makes people with alternative lifestyles to do ignorant yet selfish mess but i see it this way it hurt and bad i really dint think shell ever acknowledge being shocked because she already knew its just she didnt think her only boy out of four children would be attracted to men and women but at the end of the day im ztill going to be that 6'10" 19 year old bisexual black male oh and hapoy with who i am as k was before i told herVonte'

MaddieJoy's picture

I'm sorry!

I would let it go for a while & then try to bring it up again. Maybe they just need some time to let it sink in before they can talk--most people react badly at first because they're not prepared, but later they realize they were being jerks & at least start to act tolerantly.

The ducks will get you!

Bosemaster42's picture

You've been honest.

For now, I would let your mom think about what you've revealed and give her some time to digest it. She will most likely come around. If not, there isn't much you can do to change her mind, except be yourself, be confident and respectful, even if she chooses not to be. I hope everything works out in your favor though.

jeff's picture


I wouldn't rush to any conclusions. Like I said before, they get their time to freak out and not know how to process the information, since you likely did the same at some point, too. This is their time. Just try and be the calm, reasonable person in any confrontations, and give them time to accept it. I mean, if they questioned this in the past and are still shocked, then there are clearly some issues to work through. Otherwise, "Oh no, that thing I thought was true is true" doesn't really make much sense as a freakout.

The goal is to make them the unreasonable ones and to answer with love, kindness, and control. If they say "faggot," you can say that is a hurtful word but I realize you are just adjusting to this, so that's fine. I love you, and I'll give you time to adjust.

Very boring. There's nothing gained from escalating an argument now.

But being out is still better than being closeted, since you are living in truth. So, hang in there. You'll get through this.

"I am living this life as lovingly as I can be as flawed as I am." - Brandon Lacy Campos