When did you first realize...

elph's picture

...that you might be gay?

Here's an article that should be quite uplifting... as well as calling forth not just a few smiles:

HuffPost Gay Voices Readers Share When They First Realized They Were Not Straight



anarchist's picture

A flower sprouts from a seed,

and the instant it does, it becomes eternally a flower. It grows, it changes, but it is always the flower is was meant to be. When it blooms, it becomes clear to the world that it is indeed a flower, and it may die and disappear from existence.
But the moment it bloomed was the moment the world new, not itself. It may have known what it was the moment the seed germinated. But that was not important. What mattered was its development, though the world might percieve otherwise.

elph's picture

You've been away?

Don't disappear... please. Oasis needs you... and you, it!

Anyway: In last night's comment did you mean new?

Just wondering...


PS edit: This was originally composed as a PM, but was accidentally posted as a comment! Oh, well...

Bosemaster42's picture

Nice analogy,

It's funny, I think my first realization was at my Grandmother's house when I was 8 or 9. My aunt had a subscription to Cosmopolitan magazine and I would thumb through them when I was bored. Well, she must have had one for Playgirl as well, because I found several issues crammed into the magazine holder she had. I was pretty slick about not getting caught, because I never did. They always thought I was just reading Cosmo, I guess. Thinking back though, you would think even reading Cosmo was a dead giveaway, Heh!

jacjessen90's picture

so...i'm not the only lad who reads cosmo? huzzah und hallalu!

btw, is it weird to always score perfectly on the cosmo quiz w/o cheating? even though one is male? or just odd that according to cosmo i'd be the perfect woman?
~"i'm a real Witch, Before, During AND After my coffee!"

anarchist's picture

Dude. You should be a transgender.

There are a lot more straight guys than gay ones.

I'm just planting ideas.

elph's picture

Do you wanna know...

...a good fertilizer?

anarchist's picture

Are you talking about mind control?

Because I'm not imporing any fertilizer from North Korea.

jacjessen90's picture


according to the latest sexualaty study gays are roughly 12%, bi's 58-62%, and streights the remainder so in truth bisexuals rule the world! *questionnarre does not take into account trans* or other sexualatys than these three....
~"i'm a real Witch, Before, During AND After my coffee!"

anarchist's picture

I think I used to know what my first realization was.

But, again, it didn't matter to me. I just went with however I felt, save for a few times when homophobia scared me. Anyway, if I ever knew when I started being attracted to men, I forgot that a long time ago.

And Bosemaster42, I was really inspired last night to write, for some reason, so I also started on a larger analogy for something more personal, which I worked on for a few hours until I was too tired to continue. This one's a bit longer, so it'll probably turn out to be a short story, if not a novella. (This one is also a lot better; I had spent hours planning it out in my mind before starting to write.)

Bosemaster42's picture

Sounds cool,

Are you going to post it or is it too long?

anarchist's picture

I'm definitely going to post it.

I might have to do it in parts if it gets long, but I will post when it's done.
I only have two and a half pages written because it's still in the exposition stage. No real rising plot yet, just foreshadowing.
The protagonist is again a rabbit, like another story that I think I've posted here, so I have no idea how I'm going to get any dialogue in (especially since the only other characters I have so far are a fox and a few mice). Do share ideas on dialogue; advice is always welcome, though it would be more appropriate if you had the actual progress so far.
Let me know if you want a PM with it.

elph's picture

If you ever consider...

majoring in Creative Writing in college, there are a number of very good choices. You may want to PM radiosilence95 and hear what she may have to say... :)

anarchist's picture

I would never consider that.

I am not a writer. I am, above all, a musician. I only write when I am so compelled to that it would be more difficult to do nothing at all. I don't even really read.
When I do write, the inspiration comes from my life. Sometimes I just find something that I've been thinking about and conjure up a good metaphor for it, and that is what results in creative writing (as was the case with my first rabbit story and "The Magician", if you remember either of those).
So I obviously don't put much emphasis on creative writing; I prefer distractions like music, which better captures the levity with which I would like to live my life.
Oh shit. I've gone and derailed the thread again. How do I always manage to do this?

jeff's picture


the originator of the thread is engaged in the derailment, it is OK.

"I am living this life as lovingly as I can be as flawed as I am." - Brandon Lacy Campos

Bosemaster42's picture


I'll take a look. You kind of got me curious now.

PokemonGeek's picture

Probably around age 12.

Probably around age 12. Although the FIRST sign must have been at my local YMCA's day camp begining when I was eightand I always wanted to go into the locker room to watch adult men take showers. I would literally stand there and watch them. Strangely enough I was in plain view and NO ONE said anything about it. I did this during the four years I went there. I mean the men could clearly see that I was staring. I had no idea back then why I liked it so much.

Poor is the man
Whose pleasures depend
On the permission of another
Love me, that's right, love me
I wanna be your baby
Wanting, needing, waiting
For you to justify my love
Hoping, praying
For you to justify my love
I'm open and ready