What you hear everywhere and nowhere- my sad story

Aearombereth's picture

I don't know what inspired me to search on the band Oasis, well yeah obviously because I love that band, actually I meant I don't know what or who inspired me to search on the band Oasis at this exact moment. I was feeling really really low today and I finally found an outlet for my emotions. Thanks to whichever deity that is looking upon me.

Life can be hard you know. Especially when you are destined to share a room with your complete opposite and are away from home with close to no money. I feel like my life is never going to improve no matter how hard I try. Someone looking from outside might say that I have a perfect life. I am in an elite institute, which guarantees to produce if not perfect then rich Computer Science engineers. But when you look from inside the mind of an introvert who is not sure what fate has bestowed upon her is what she actually wants; it's like being trapped into a dream which you never knew would turn into such a nightmare.

It feels so weird to think that there are so many supposedly highly intelligent people around you and not one of then can really understand you. It makes me think things like maybe I am the one who is at fault at everything. People taking advantage of me is not really a new thing for me. But when you have to share most of your time with someone who takes advantage of you being a quiet person who doesn't talk to anyone much and spreads rumours about you, so that in comparison they will seem better really is... depressing. Yes it seems weird but it is depressing.
It's depressing because you feel like everyone actually believes it. And when you watch everyone so willing to believe whatever a beautiful face talks about you, I feel my insignificance in comparison to everyone else. Can one's emotions really be so insignificant that anyone can come and stomp them without a single thought over what they are actually doing? Maybe it's just me over-thinking as usual. But really on times like this I wish I could be some careless drug-addict who didn't give a fuck about what their mum went through to bring where are they right now; and could through all of it to live as they want.

Comments

elph's picture

Welcome!

Tell us a bit more... :)

You do know that Oasis is a meeting space for predominantly LGBT youth?

Not exclusively, however, (myself being one exception)... but you are most welcome!