2/26/13

jazzybchick's picture

Today is Caitlin's birthday. I'm excited for her. I drew her a cupcake and said Happy Birthday. She doesn't really care that it's her birthday. She says it's just another day. I'm trying to be a good friend and make it more exciting but she won't talk to me anymore.
I'm on an antidepressant again. I've been so depressed these 2 months. Between my girlfriend leaving me and my grandpa dieing. I miss them both like crazy. I love Caitlin and I love my grandpa. Different loves... same amount of pain. I haven't been to school in weeks. I lost all motivation so my mom took me to see a therapist. She put me on Lexipro. I'm on a low dose but I really feel this stuff working. I'm involuntarily happy 80% of the time. Whoop-dee-doo. This sucks. I hope this gets better.

Comments

Bosemaster42's picture

For your own sake,

Get off the anti-depressant as soon as you can. It's okay to get down when you lose someone close. I mean it shouldn't hand-cuff you as far as, motivation and proceeding with your life, but we all have to learn how to deal with loss. It's only my opinion, mind you, but the learning process shouldn't come from a pill bottle. I say this because these drugs can alter your brain chemistry un-favorably, especially in teens.

jazzybchick's picture

Why?

Why should I get off the anti-depressant? It's helping me. It's common for most teens to be on anti-depressants. You have no idea what I go through everyday. Just because your life is unicorns and fairies, doesn't mean mine is. Losing two loved ones back to back isn't easy. I'm not hand-cuffed. Thank you very much. (Sarcasm intended.)
-Diva

MaddieJoy's picture

also, if your doctor prescribes them

you should not try to get yourself off any medications. My dad knew a man who was on meds and whenever he forgot to take them he would end up in the hospital. Things like antidepressants are easy to stop taking because you feel so good & think you don't need them, but they're what's making you feel better, so unless you're self-medicating I'd keep doing what you're doing.
If you're self-medicating, though, stop using them (obviously)

The ducks will get you!

jazzybchick's picture

I know

I'm prescibed on all my medications. I get off the meds when my doctors say I have to. I don't self medicate. I'm waiting for them to fully work and then go talk to my therapist again so she can tell me that I'm okay to get off of them. She said I'm not allowed to stop unless she says so :3
-Diva

Bosemaster42's picture

'Unicorns & Fairies',

Simply don't exist in my world sweetie. Sorry if I upset you, I was just urging caution. I never took anything in my life for depression, and yeah I think I know all about loss, my poetry tends to reflect those emotions. I guess I just deal with the bumps of life better than most, I don't know, but I meant nothing personal.

jazzybchick's picture

Don't call me sweetie.

I really don't need your warnings. I KNOW that my doctors know more about my medicines than you do. Besides... you don't even know me. Goodbye now.
-Diva

jeff's picture

Yeah...

Leave her alone. It's not like she posted this on the Internet or anything... Jeez...

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"You don't know you're beautiful." - Harry Styles