Ive not made a journal entry in quiet a while so i have a lot of updating to do!
Let me start by saying Im a 14 year old boy and im bisexual, A few month ago i would of choked on those words but now im much more comfortable with myself although Im still learning about my sexuality I can deal with it better because of my personal acceptence.
Recently I came out to my mum as bisexual, from the start she has been the one person ive been truely scared of losing but she didnt go anywhere she accepted me happily however she has lots and lots of questions that im not to sure of the answers myself so its slow going at the moment, my dad doesnt know although he loves me he can be quiet homophobic and I dont think im ready to tell him...
School was a major issue for me but I think Ive told a good 20 or 30 people all together which include most of my closest friends! Im not lying when i say each person has been just as supportive as the next; I guess ive been lucky because so far no one has turned against me, im lucky in the sense that everyone ive told is open minded enough to accept me for who i am and still think of me in the same way, which is exactly what i want!:)
Im also getting to a point where im really not bothered what anyone else has to say about me, which doesnt necessarily mean i want to come out fully but Im prepared for when that day comes :)
Whilst closeted i was doing a lot of bad things; drinking and smoking mainly which makes me sound like a really bad person i know? Drinking and smoking at 14... its deffinately not something im proud of doing but It was out of pure hatred for myself, it was an escape and at the time it was the only way i knew how to cope? Also I was cutting myself... That was my biggest embarrassment.. Having to hide the scars was awful and obviously i still have to hide them now and looking back i have no clue what made me do it but its in the past, coming out has changed my life in a way :) As cheesy as that sounds i wouldnt be the same person if i hadnt told someone
So the point of this journal was to express my feelings for those who are going through something similar because I remember looking and googling every night trying to find stories and situations i could relate to and its just nice to get things off your mind sometimes :) Thank you for reading!