it's a secret

friskies's picture

I'm in love. So so so in love. But, I'm having sexual curiosities that are not like me at all. All these years... through puberty and into young adulthood, I've always been convinced of my sexuality. I've never once, and still haven't, had a crush or have been emotionally attracted to that team, but wondering how it would feel sexually is happening now of all times.

Don't get me wrong, I'd never act on it. I'm fully committed to my love, and we certainly do not share. I'm emotionally and physically attracted to my love, there are no problems in that department whatsoever. Just late at night, when my thoughts start to wander, I cant help but have sexual fantasies about the team I've never really been sexually interested in. I'm certain it is just a phase, not like I'm ever going to cheat on my love to find out. Because at the end of the day, I'm usually always sexually satisfied. These sexual curiosities about the other team are insignificant. But, still significant enough to want to share, even with strangers.


radiosilence95's picture

I think a lot of straight

I think a lot of straight people occasionally wonder about being with someone of the same gender. But there's a difference between occasional fantasies and suppressed sexuality. If these fantasies persist over a long period of time and occur a lot, like way more than once in awhile, then that's a red flag. But if it's just every now and then and you really are committed to your relationship, it shouldn't be a huge issue.

See, there are plenty of people (mostly women) who are straight but not narrow. Meaning that they exclusively date members of the opposite sex, but they can appreciate a good-looking person of the same sex and even feel slight attraction towards them. It's not unhealthy or bad, it's just that sexuality is far more fluid than many of us think.

friskies's picture

I appreciate your thoughts

I appreciate your thoughts on the matter; thank you! So, if imagine a lot of straight people occasionally wonder about being with someone of the same gender, then do homosexual people occasionally wonder about being with someone of the opposite gender?

I'm aware that most homosexual people have a moment in their life when they're just like, well this is it, I'm gay. Though, don't some know right from the get-go? What about those that do know right from the get-go, do you think they may wonder about the opposite sex later down the road?

You're absolutely right; sexuality is fluid. This is why I'm not too worried about it. ;)

radiosilence95's picture

Well, I'm only one person,

Well, I'm only one person, so I can't necessarily speak for the entire LGBT community. But for me personally, when I was still coming to grips with the idea of me being gay, I would wonder about being with a guy, but as time passed, that wondering stopped. But I should also mention that I'm not an overly sexual person to begin with, I'm not one of those people who constantly craves sex, so I may not be the best example :P

Yes, I've encountered gays who figured it out when they were nine or ten years old, and I'm sure there are some who knew even sooner. I'm not sure how to answer your last question, though. I would think that a gay person who figured it out at an early age wouldn't wonder about the opposite quite as much as a gay person who figured it out later, just because they've had more time to be more sure of their sexuality. Plus when you're going through puberty you're usually just really curious about sex in general, so a gay person who discovered their sexuality during that phase in their life would be more confused by their hormones and social pressures in high school.

That may not have made any sense. But, like I said, everybody's different. I'm sure there are plenty of straights who pretty much never fantasize about the same sex, and vise versa, like myself.