I, Super Duck, queen of social awkwardness, am possibly/probably/hopefully hanging out with the girl I like this weekend. Wait... What's that noise? The sound of all of your jaws collectively hitting the floor in shock? Yeah, I'm pretty shocked too. It's just coffee, and I don't even know if it's a "date" or not, so I'm hesitant to call it that.
It's the cute blonde girl, of course. Quick backstory here: Yesterday morning I really, really wanted some Starbucks. There's one right down the street, so I went to it. I've been there lots of times. I just go there and get my coffee and go back to my room all the time. No big deal.
But that time it was a huge fucking deal because Cute Blonde Girl was there! But she looked busy with homework, so I didn't say anything to her, only panicked silently. When I was waiting for my coffee, she happened to look up and smile and wave at me, multiplying my panic levels by 325243524. I got my coffee and ran back to my room, then spent the rest of the day hating myself for it.
Today, I had class with her. I really, really, really wanted to talk to her, but she makes me ultra nervous because she's so cute. I pretty much lose all ability to function like a normal human being around her. So I just said, "I saw you at Starbucks yesterday!" because I'm Captain Obvious.
Cute Blonde Girl: Oh yeah, I saw you too!
Me: You looked busy, though, so I didn't want to bother you.
Cute Blonde Girl: You should've said hi!
Me: Maybe I will next time.
As soon as I said that, I started internally flipping my shit. Where did that even come from? That sounds so weird! Like what the hell? Why would I even say that? But then...
Cute Blonde Girl: I'll probably be there again this Sunday.
Everyone I've asked so far says that is definitely an invitation and on Wednesday I should ask her what time.
But it was so embarrassing because the whole time, I was doing the nervous voice. The nervous voice is terrible. I turn into, like, a total, like, valley girl? Even though I've never even, like, been to California? It used to drive my friends in high school absolutely insane.
I have never been so nervous in my life. It was seriously at least twelve times as terrifying as giving my salutatory speech at graduation, which I regard as one of the most horrifying moments of my life. The whole time, all I could think about is this video: