I walked into the Theatre and Arts building yesterday, and I noticed the scent of the carpetting, clean and anti-septic. I knew what the scent would do to me, memories of last year came flooding back in their entirety almost. I looked up at the balcony, I guess you could call it, I miss seeing you there and I miss being there with you.
It's kind of sad I should even say this, we are still friends, we are still there for each other when things haven't gone right or we wanted to have fun. We were both so naïve in our own little bubble of screens and what passed for pop culture. We both move on, and that's ok. What isn't ok is when I have those memories and they seem to make me sad.
You've since gone to a different college and we don't see each other as often as we used to. I've told that what I fear the most is drifting apart, but you've since assured me, and confided in me that you've a similar disposition. Thinking about it now, I now feel more comfortable being by myself more often.
But getting used to something isn't always easy, and it wasn't easy for me. I did used to be alone for long periods of time long ago when relationships didn't mean very much to me. Now I see what I have and I can fully appreciate the people in my life and what I can do to make them laugh, smile and be happy in general around me.
I love to do that, I really do. You nor I or any person can live in the past, we move on whether we want to or not. I'm moving on, slowly and at my own pace. Even though we're apart physically we are together in friendship. I still have your gift in the den that I wrapped a few weeks ago. I'll drop by to give it to you, you said that would be great.
It isn't okay to be sad with memories that were of good times, like I said, but from now on I will take comfort in the fact that they were good times and that they wouldn't last forever. That's why they're memories, that's why they're so vivid and lasting, because I knew the moments were fleeting and finite. Now they can serve to comfort me.
And I also hope that you remember them as I do, having fun and enjoying those days we were together.