questions i've been asked within 10-15 minutes of meeting a straight person:
when did i first want to fuck men
what i do in bed
what i did first in bed
how did i lose my virginity
who i fucked first
who fucked me first
how old they were
do i wear condoms
do i have aids
how do i feel about aids
what kind of porn do i watch
what kind of porn have i watched
when i fucked girls did i like it
was my father around when i was a child
is that why i got fucked by older men as a teenager
is that why i date a recovering heroin addict
i would be utterly MORTIFIED to ask ANYONE questions like these when i'd just met them? why do people fucking care about my sexual history? ??????
from there my brain has been deconstructing how being queer is perceived as biological/genetic and how that plays into these encounters. and i think i touched on something really important i wanted to share with you folk.
these are what these questions are inevitably asking: are you queer *for real* (with the biological receipts to prove it) or are you just fucked up (psychological/nurture issues)?
and you know what? fuck this whole BORN THIS WAY shit, fuck this constructed biohistory we give ourselves. the whole notion of the "gay gene" is a MYTH. it was proven ONCE in a 1993 study, the results were NEVER proven consistently thereafter, EVEN when they tried the same test again.
IT ISN'T REAL. if you think about it, so much of how we're perceived by others is shaped by a hegemonic medical gaze: HIV/AIDS, the gay gene, psychoanalysis, ect.
ANYWAY, THE ISSUE WITH 'BORN THIS WAY'/GENETIC HISTORIES: it depoliticizes what is inherently a political issue. it doesn't matter if we were born ANY way at all:
because the actual issue is that political bodies and social institutions DO NOT RECOGNIZE OUR OWN AGENCY AND AUTONOMY OVER OUR BODIES.
WHEN A PERSON ASKS THESE QUESTIONS THEY ARE PERPETUATING THIS MEDICAL HEGEMONY - THEY ARE DIAGNOSING YOU.