Been a tough week for me. My area was hit with flooding a few days ago, and my family wasn't all that affected because we're on a higher elevation than the rest of the town, but we didn't have internet for a a few days and no school as well.
A few days after I read my speech to my class I started getting notes in my locker, anonymous comments about my speech. There were no negative ones, but most were eye opening.
A few examples:
"I don't think you're gay but just so you know these are the gay players on our school's teams. [A list of 6 guys and one girl]. How do I know? I'm one of them!"
"You made me feel good about being gay : )"
"I wish I had the balls to give that speech. Too bad you didn't run for Class President"
Then this one:
"If you're gay, wear that shiny tie again at the speech tournament. If you do, I'm going to ask you to be my BF"
I read it and quickly put that note in my pocket, and for the rest of the day I just wasn't there. All I could think about was who could have written that? Or maybe it was a trap? Maybe someone wanted to out me?
At home I looked at the note, and the printing, and it just seemed like I had seen that style before? I couldn't figure it out, and then I went through my debate notebook and found what I was looking for.
Earlier in the year in debate class we did this assignment where you exchanged a speech you wrote with another classmate who made suggestions for edits, and I had given my speech to Colin, a quiet and shy kid in my class. His parents made him take debate to try to get him to open up and come out of his shell. He even gave a speech about that once, which now seems like a real brave thing to do.
The neat printing on the speech matched the note.
The next day in debate we teamed up in groups of two to discuss ideas for the upcoming debate tournament, and I chose Colin, and he just seemed nervous the whole time. He told me that I needed to do the speech about gay athletes, he even called it a winner. He was working on one about how kids often have huge obstacles to overcome, and the irony of that hit me hard. Was he telling me something there, or was I over thinking things?
I was checking him out physically, as I guess he has done to me (over thinking again?). Colin's my height, a little heavier, and has pale skin with 38 million freckles (I counted!). When I started wearing Adidas black ankle socks, he started wearing them too. Was he copying off of me or was it just a coincidence? More over thinking? He was wearing shorts, like almost everyone does at school this time of year, and he has nice legs.
That night I started thinking about him, and the attraction became real as my hand went to work. The orgasm knocked me out. I don't know if I should write that or not? The next morning when I woke up my undies were still down at my knees.
The next day in debate Colin and I worked together again, and he was sitting to my left, and he stretched, giving me a good view of his slightly flabby belly and his deep belly button. Intentionally done, or more over thinking? I got so hard it hurt. Is my penis doing my thinking for me?
We didn't have school Wednesday through Friday because of the flooding, but our debate teacher let us know by e-mail that the tournament was still on. Colin asked me to come over to do some more practice on our speeches, but we ended up playing with his younger brothers instead. They were going crazy from being cooped up in the house because of the rain. Colin's brothers all look like him, but they have completely opposite personalities.
Next time I'll write about the debate tournament, and if I wore the shiny tie or not?