How sad is it that I was waiting on it to end? So that's five months down the drain along with a two year friendship and my freaking celibacy. What did it all come down to? You wouldn't beleve it if I told you. But I'm ok with it ending, I'd returnt to bad habits from the stress, (smoking cigars and drinking),.
Because of my health I try to stay away from those things but UGH I just needed something to take the edge off. Worse part is, people started noticing the change in me. Not just people I knew well but people from school who only saw me once a week and barely knew my name. This was bad, very very bad. I had to together myself together.
Even doe it didn't end until today I'd made up my mind Friday that I'd end it. And truth be told, he'd been wanting to dump me for awhile now. I could tell by the way he talked to me and the arguements he would start.
I think I'll stay single for awhile, I really don't have an option there but that a different story. A sadder more bitter one. One that makes me think I should have just given the one person willing to except most of me for who I am and been contempt.