Dream Journal #whatever

anarchist's picture

I had a nice dream last night about finding someone else who made me feel better. We had some fun and I almost got over Yk. Then they both started ignoring me and just started a relationship between each other. All he Nick Cave in the world couldn't make me feel better. I'd write more, but I'm in New York and don't have much time to myself.

Comments

Perhaps We Should Leave's picture

...

Seriously, oh my fucking god, it was a dream, this has NOTHING to do with real life besides your obsession with Yk, how about you look for somebody REAL.

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A man is defined not by his convictions, but by what he denies of himself.

anarchist's picture

Thank you.

That made me feel a lot better. You're a wonderful person.

Perhaps We Should Leave's picture

Oh golly

I'm sorry, is my job supposed to make you feel all warm and fuzzy? Are we all supposed to watch you tear yourself to little pieces with your self-destructive little obsession?

I don't give a flying fuck if you think I'm a good person or a bad person; it's not my fucking job to be nice. Especially not when you obviously won't listen to 'nice', given that everyone around you on this goddamn site is being so 'nice' about everything. You don't listen to them, do you? So why the fuck should I be nice?

I'm not good, I'm not bad, I'm not nice, I'm just telling you the goddamn truth. This crush, this obsession, is PATHETIC, and it is making you miserable. And you are choosing it. So no I'm not gonna be nice. I'm not gonna act like you obviously want everyone around you to act and be so fawning over you. You're acting like a fucking STALKER and it's not cute, it's not romantic, it's fucking CREEPY.

So grow the fuck up. I've tried being nice. I've tried being 'good'. Everyone else is trying that too, but you won't listen. So listen hard and listen good:

YOU ARE BEING A FUCKING CREEP TOWARDS THIS BOY. YOU ARE OBSESSED. IF HE KNEW HOW YOU ARE ACTING TO THE FULL EXTENT HE WOULD BE AFRAID.

That clear enough?

* * *

A man is defined not by his convictions, but by what he denies of himself.

lonewolf678's picture

I've missed alot these past days...

Anar, I implore you to consider the ramifications of holding on to something that will never be. You can't isolate yourself and expect things to change, and don't read into your dreams, they can and will play tricks on you. For what and why, who knows? I highly recommend you talk to someone, for instance someone on a hotline just willing to listen, those do exist.

Sometimes talking to a stranger can be a big help, they may even be able to help. Take a gander at the resources page, even though it's been posted before by Jeff in previous comments.