February 2000

Hey everyone. I'm back. I enjoyed receiving your letters. You seem to like my "Not trying too hard" style.


Let me start off by saying you may not get all of this column without reading my last column. it was my first column, so please read it and tell me what you think. This one too. I enjoy reading all the mail I get so please don't hesitate.

Also, I should have mentioned this last issue, but basically everyone I knew freshman year was a senior. So that's why it was called "Mike's BRIEF tour out of the closet", because everyone I knew graduated, and I was back in the closet by the beginning of sophomore year.

The sad part was losing Tes to University of Florida. I had to go to Michigan at the beginning of summer, and she planned to see me off at the airport. I actually found her roaming around TOTALLY lost while I was waiting for elevator doors to close. It was pretty funny watching her dash into the elevator as they were almost shut.

It was a sorrowful goodbye. I gave her a note that I wrote telling her how much she meant to me and got on the plane. Most of the note was like a prayer that we wouldn't lose touch... and we still haven't.

But enough of the past. I got some news.

I hung out with John.

Yeah, I KNOW. You see, over Christmas break, I had a chance to see Tes. I had coincidentally rented her favorite game (Bust A Groove. You have to see it.) when she had called me. She had NO car. She had no way to get over, but she really, really wanted to see me (and play the game), and the only way she could get over here was to call John and have him give her a ride.

Personally, I had been wanting to confront John. Writing last month's issue gave me an outlet for all the frustrations I had. I'm over John. Really.

So why not? I'd probably end up talking with Tes the whole time, anyway. I certainly didn't want to make it awkward, though. John and Tes are best friends. It will be something I have to deal with. So we went. In the car, she told me we couldn't hook up the PlayStation in her house so we were going to John's house.

I hadn't been there since... since we...

It doesn't matter. I have to put that stuff behind me. Its water under the bridge. When we got there, I saw his parents. I wonder if they had recognized me. The last time I'd seen them, it was at the accident. They were well aware of John's sexuality by now, and I wondered if they recognized me. What they were thinking.

They weren't around for long though. We played the game. It was a lot of fun. I'm sure Tes had a great time, being surrounded by her two best friends. Even though there was a hint of awkwardness in the air, it wasn't coming from me. I was cool as a cucumber the whole night. Really.

So it had been about midnight. Tes was due back to her house. Perhaps I was, too, but I didn't really care. The plan was to go to Denny's sometime before 12, but that never happened. I was really hungry. So after we dropped Tes off, I asked John if he wanted to go to Denny's. He said sure.

We had a pleasant conversation in the restaurant. We talked mostly about our lives. What had been going on as far as our lifestyle choice went. He obviously hadn't been keeping tabs on me that much. He wasn't even aware that I was back in the closet. Is that good or not?

The more I kept on speaking with him, the more I couldn't help but find a certain intimidation inside him. It seemed like he had been waiting for me to explode at him the whole night. I've been too mature to do something like that. And the day at the mall two years ago should have been his proof of that.

We never talked about "us" though. In fact, if we did, I probably would have just changed the subject. I don't think it was a topic that needed to be addressed. Like I said, water under the bridge. Nothing we can do to change it and I don't think there's anything more I want to know about what happened because it really... doesn't... matter...

After we ate, he took me home. That was it. End of night. Nothing too "eventful". Just a nice dinner with someone who had become a nicer person. No big deal.

I'd probably be bereft not to say that I saw them again while they were in the area, but not for long. It was New Years morning. After a hard night of partying, me and my friends hit the local Denny's. Then as we were heading out, one of my friends said "Hey Mike, there's some chick yelling at you." It was Tes. With John, and some guy I don't know. I sat with them for a few minutes, but I couldn't stay because my friends were at the register and I needed to give them money for my food. So it was a short conversation, I told them what we did New Years, and she told me. That was all. It was nice seeing her, though.

Now, as I leave you, faithful readers, let me tell you that not EVERY column I write will be about Tes. I have plenty of columns coming your way and felt this would be a nice "epilogue" for those who read my first column.

Guess I'll see you next month,



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