Jonathan P.

May 2000

Angels never came down

There's no one here they want,

to hang around

But if they knew

If they knew you at all

Then one by one the angels

Angels would fall

-Angels would fall by Melissa Etheridge

Well kids I must say I'm HAPPY as a fag in heat over the responses I'm getting over the email system. I've gotten uproar, cheers, jeers, headaches, boners, and a whole lotta nothing in the middle.

It's funny writing a column sometimes. You think, what the hell have I got to write about? I do it for the sheer fun of writing and meeting the people who dis(agree) with me. Some said my articles are on the money. Some have said they're insulting. Some have even said they're controversial. OH GOD! No Controversial articles in Gay America, they can't handle it!!!!! I thought about what I would write about this time around. It happened when I was driving home from school the other day, looking at a Fantasia I'll never smoke, listening to a song I really don't like, and feeling the up and down weather in Georgia. I thought about writing about me, my life, MY BIRTHDAY ON THE 28TH OF APRIL (even though this article is being sent in on the 15th.)

I'm 18 years old and I live in Augusta Georgia. We had the golf thingy in the beginning of April remember? Sucked I know. I write, read, listen to music, ride the waves of the world and feel the ground beneath my feet. I am out to my parents, in a don't ask don't tell kind of way. I'm trying very hard to mend it but I doubt it will mend easily. My parents are like so many other southern parents of my generation. THEY DON'T LIKE GAY PEOPLE. It's just that simple. It wouldn't matter if you were their parent, co-worker, siblings, son, daughter, GOD even. They don't like GAY PEOPLE. It's how the Republicans will put a man in the white house. George Bush met with Gay Republicans recently in Washington. I wonder what will happen from his Christian support. Oh I must repeat that. I wonder what will happen with his XIAN support. That is to my friend Sara in Michigan. We're both fed up with those Christians who think its necessary to force the world down everyone's throat.

I once waited on a group of these people. My co-server for this party was gay and flamed it to the world! Go baby! Anyway, I the straight acting waiter had to sit and listen as they made comments "is that guy gay or what?" "oooo he's goin to hell!" I wonder...if that guy had been God, would they have treated him differently? How do WE KNOW God isn't gay and just gave the world straight people just so there'd be harmony? Poor me, I'm going to hell for that I know it.

So I'm semi out to rents, out to friends, teachers, co-workers, etc. I'm a six foot tall, blonde hair blue eyes boy with muscles and a free thinking mind. I use to say I was ugly, but my god so many people have told me I'm not, and then asked to date me, I guess I am cute! Okay enough self loving.

When will we start exploring the roots and basis of being Gay? I am wondering when there will be more people like Andrew who wrote in on my Child Raising article. He has a site on Gay in the Past type theme. You can go to it at: http://www.androphile.org/preview/Entrance/index.htm

Andrew is trying to show the world that there was gay issues in the ancient and not so recent times.

When will we as a lifestyle, as a population, as human beings, see that we are life, and not just a party to live? When will we stop pretending that our lives were meant for having sex and doing drugs and everything else, and see that we're here for something more. I think gay people are the students of Jesus. I think we were put on this planet to help people see that we are all God's children, we all breath the same air, and we are all human. It isn't just the Christians who have to push God on people. No the majority think it's also enough to pass judgment on people.

I feel so simple sitting here. I can't do enough to show people, both gay and straight, that we're all here as people and as humans. We should all work together to further the world. We as gay people especially should try and mend our broken chains with the straights and Christians. How hard are we really trying to fill that gap?

Finally, the last half of this article will be about the things that I've seen lately that piss me off. Not many but at least a few, the criticisms about the gay community I like to showcase. See how many responses I get from this one.

Here goes my spot on Oasis!

I CANNOT STAND CHICKEN HAWKS! Yes that's right, I can't stand old men hitting on me and wanting to shower me with gifts, toys, and sex held up by Viagra. I love the Internet. I love the chat rooms to the ultimate. But what I can't stand is for some 40yo to msg me and say "wanna hook up?" or "wanna jerk on the phone?" or any other sexual advance.

I got an email from a guy named Bob in New England a while back. Bob is middle age and a very cool guy. He sent me an email half agreeing, highlighting a few points on my article, and struck up a conversation. We've been e-mailing happily ever since.

Now why can't the rest of the older generation respect and converse with the younger pop this way? Instead of the older gay generation trying to teach the younger a thing or two about life and the world, OUT OF BED, they want to try and push themselves on us and use US, the younger generation as a lemon-knot for their life because they're so insecure at a grown up age. BLAH.

On the same note, ha ha I have not forgot about you little bastards out there. Yes the ones who are young and know it. Hell I'm young and hot and I love it. But you, no you must seek out older guys to be loved by, to be screwed by, and to be spent on by. I've met so many people in my gay life. Internet and in real life I talk to people about everything. I cannot tell you how many times I've met guys who say "ooo I've met this hot 25, 35, 45, 55!yo and he's got so much money!" I use to know a guy who lived here in Augusta with me. He started talking to this guy in Alaska, knowing full well there was 20yrs difference between them. He talked to the guy, sexually most of the time, over the phone. The guy sent him a computer and a keyboard system.

DAMN! I want some of that!

Here in real life-vil, if your young and hot, they're will always be a sect in the older population that will covey to you and use you for sex, looks, power, pity, god only knows what. But hey you get the money in the end right? I look at these teenagers and boy and think: "Pathetic!"

On a personal note, I lost my first boyfriend to an older guy because apparently the guy could afford to give him the clothes and money. I'm so tired of the younger generation being so hung up on money and looks.

Ever notice the three F's?! It means: No Fats, No Fems, No Freaks! HA! Take a browse on Yahoo and you will see lots of ads with No fats, fems or freaks on the end of it. This mean nobody that's fat, nobody that acts flamey or queeny, and no piercing etc. WOW They haven't even SEEN YOU YET!

I will go right now and ruin my literary career by saying that: All people who put the three F's on their personal ad's must either have no lives, or must be way insecure with their sexuality and state of mind.

Another thing that pisses me off is fags that think they have to wave a rainbow flag running down the street, and tell everyone they meet they're gay. Do you people realize how hard you're making it for younger, more closeted souls to come out? Don't you think they sit in the background and listen to the whispers and the jeers about you, stuck in the foreground? You criticize these people for not shouting their sexuality from the rafters. Like its some sin to worry about your own psycho-, physio-, pathological health!

Now on top of all this STUFF, I will pile one more thing.

TO all those boys and girls out there who think they're so hot, who go to the parties and drink and do drugs until the world crumbles in their pants, FUCK YOU. Life is a party and parties aren't meant to last. Stop living your life in a dark party with dark drugs and dark people. Life isn't a party, its an experience you'll never forget.

THERE. That's the controversial part of this month's article.

In closing I just want to make people understand that just because we're gay, we're not perfect, at least not entirely (almost there kids!).

"My heart is human, My blood is boiling, my brain IBM!

I'm just a man who needed someone, and somewhere to hide!" -Styx. Mr. Robot.

"Buying bread from a man in Brussels He was six foot four and full of muscles. I said, "Do you speak-a my language?" He just smiled and gave me a vegemite sandwich. - Down Under by Men at Work



About the Author
©1995-2000 Oasis Magazine. All Rights Reserved.