All the lonely people
Where do they all come from?
All the lonely people
Where do they all belong?
Paul and John sang it best.
I sat in bar in Fort Lauderdale two nights ago, watching the people come and go. Drinking my vodka and cranberry, I observed. I watched the ones who came together. I watched the ones who sat alone. I watched the players mosey around, looking for a kill. Looking to seal the deal. Looking for one who could give them one less night of loneliness. Then when I was done, after an hour or so, I got back in my car and drove home.
Im spending more and more time with my DVD player. Snuggling up with it before I go to sleep. Holding it in my arms, whispering sweet nothings into its power connectors Whenever I feel down, I pop in something and stare at Ryan Phillippes bare ass. It tends to perk me up slightly.
Michael told me my goal for the New Year should be to find a man. Hes got one, and I guess he thinks Ill be happier if I have one to call my own Speaking of him, he hasnt called much of late. Hes too busy. He and his boy went to go get tested last week. Im sure theyre both fine, since theyve been all-monogamous-like for the past 5 months I havent heard much from him otherwise
Well this month marks my 12th column for this site. March 2001 is my one-year anniversary. Wow. Im more surprised at myself than anything else
Ive been spending a lot of my time working on my website. Its pretty kewl. If youre interested, you should check it out. Therere even some recent pictures of me buried in there somewhere. Heres the link for you modern peoples: http://elliotlane.editthispage.com
The way things are going, theyre gonna crucify me.
Im convinced John was a madman. Marrying Yoko. Eww. What was he thinking?
Maybe next month Ill have something worth reading til then:
Elliot, 23, is stuck in the doldrums known as Boca Raton, FL. Contact him via firstname.lastname@example.org. Soon. Dammit, do it now. Im not kidding. Email him right now. Doesnt he deserve your time? He spent all this time writing this column, and whether you liked it or not you could at least have the decency to write him a quick note and tell him. Puh-leaze, like hes asking for much from you?
Does he want a pint of your blood? No.
Does he want your first-born son? No.
Does he want you to murder his ex (that lying whore)? Nope.
Just a simple little note. Go ahead, give it a try you may just like it.
email@example.com. go on, give it a little click. Please?
firstname.lastname@example.org. come on, Im begging ya here please? pretty please?
Dammit! Forget it, Im going home.