Robert Hines

May 1997

Hi all, I have worked out a few things in my head, especially about religion, I'm not talking about being gay and having a religion, OK? I know I'm gonna have people writing me with something harsh about this article. I don't think I would bother starting an email argument either. I got confirmed in the Roman Catholic church, mom said 'just do it for me.' She wanted me to because of some promise she made to the Catholic church that her and my father would bring me up the "proper Catholic way of life".

After confirmation, my mother and I talked to the priest about homosexuality. My church is only a few years old, its very modern looking for a catholic church. The priest went on and on about do good and the Lord always will love you. Like I didn't know or anything?! He said in his little way that it would be a sin for a male to have what he called "sex."

He told me I would be using someone else for sex and it wouldn't be considerate of the other person. What people don't understand is being attracted to another male, since I don't like to label myself as gay anymore, and pursuing it would be part of a relationship for me. My mother was extremely angry at the church for dictating that to me.

I do not believe in religion as having the exact meaning. As for organized religion, there is nothing to believe in. There is something that is there and is true, God and Love. 'Religions' do have good parts to them, but they are not all good and why build something on top of the truth. Why believe in some thought that is based on the ideas and thoughts of *men* who lived hundreds and thousands of years ago. Another thing is all those people out there that are away from God, the church is the thing that depresses. The church and organized religion has nothing at all to do with God. I wear 4 crosses around my neck sometimes, just because I want to. I think this month I found myself as far as God comes, and I hope others realize God is not the church.

This raised another issue I had been dealing with, sex before marriage. If you believe in it then you believe that the only purpose of sex is the have offspring which is stupid to believe in if you are involved in a relationship where having offspring together is impossible. The only reasoning I see in sex before marriage is to protect young people from having babies themselves. Another benefit of this is it would give you a better chance in a lasting relationship. If you have sex with just anyone or people you go out with for a few months then having sex with someone you love doesn't mean as much, like I'm one to talk, but this is true. I guess I've been doing a lot of thinking lately and my columns have been filled with 'The Way to Live', an ongoing story by Robbie. As far as sex before marriage though, its not a sin, and its not a ticket to bed either.

It seems lately I've seen more and more people become freaks. I see freaks as people like myself, who go against society. In Sydney most of the people would be somewhat rednecky. This weekend I was in Halifax for the weekend, again:) I'm not a freak there. People don't care as much. Halifax is what I call the little big city. Not to big, not to small perfect size. I don't think I'd want to live there, I don't want to live here either. May be I'm just realizing Sydney has never been this bad or may be things are changing, one of my friends went out with this guy who loved slashing his wrists and drinking his blood. For here that's pretty different. Enough about that, now about me.

OK, I went to Halifax, you all heard already, this weekend. I met up with a friend from Sydney who goes to Dalhousie University there and found out she was dating someone really older than her, which I think is great, I hate people who look at me for my age. Being at my high school, being 16, and being in grade 10 are the things I wish were not associated with me at all. I don't want anything associated with me really except the way I am. I don't like seeing myself or anyone else different. I think it would be disgusting to think like that. I think I want to start a youth group up here. I'll write a letter to planned parenthood of Nova Scotia in Sydney and ask to see if I can get some assistance.

Also, I think may be I might be asking someone out. This is someone I like, not just someone to go out with. I dunno what will happen. He seems real innocent, honest, sincere, and has a head on his shoulders. It feels like this guy is a one in a million type thing, since there is hardly anyone around here, so hopefully it will work out, there's always others. I got my drivers license last month. Ya hoo! :) Mom and dad are taking advantage of this, I'm driving everyone pretty much everywhere, but they trust me with the car. And I have a government curfew of 12. We got graduated licensing here:( I updated my webpage big time again , so u know, go and visit. Thanks btw everyone for all of your email. I don't know when spring is going to get here, we pretty much got rid of all of our snow this weekend with rain, in Halifax it was sunny and warm enough to be out with a t-shirt on, sigh. I have just 2 mid-terms coming up this week and a 4 day weekend, hopefully we'll get some good weather. I would like to say hi to all the people I met this weekend in HFX. Hopefully I made some sense with my writings this month.

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