December 1997

Hello all,

First, I want to say thanks to EVERYONE. Everyone who has sent me an e-mail about my columns. You don't know how much it means to me, when I read a letter. The next thing I want to say, is HAPPY BIRTHDAY OASIS! and to Jeff, a great editor, and whatever else he does...... he sure does a good job, and I don't think he gets enough credit for what he does for this online zine!!

Well now.... I guess I should start by telling you all, today I decided that Jim (not his real name) the guy that I was flirting with, isn't going to go anywhere. I don't really know why, maybe it's because I am scared of rejection, but he doesn't seem to show a whole lot of interest when I try to talk to him. Its kind of like he is making it look like he is paying attention, but really isn't. So I am not going to ignore him, but I going to stop making it so I see him in the halls, so that he has to say hi, or stuff like that. If he says something to me, and tries to get me, great! But, if he doesn't OK, I'll live with it.

My mother has been battling lyme disease for the past three years, and they (the doc's) had her on an IV treatment, and they thought it was gone. but I came home and there was a note from my father in my room, saying that he was going to San Diego and that my mother was sick again, and that I have to help her as much as possible. OK, I can do that, I have been doing it for a long time, but I begin to wonder, how much longer is this going to take. She has been on everything from pure Penicillin to acupuncture. I mean, this is in a way worse than AIDS, because it kills the nerves in the brain, so you can't think anymore. It also kills the nerves in the body so that you cant feel anything. My mother takes five minutes to get to the bathroom, which is a few feet away from her bed! Whereas AIDS just hurts the immune system. I know that AIDS is bad, but lyme, in my opinion is worse, to some degree. I know some people might not agree with me.

The last thing on my mind is that I have been thinking a lot about coming out at my school. just because I have a lot of people asking me when I am going to get a girlfriend. I just say when the right one comes along I guess, then I say to myself, well there ain't ever going to be a "right one". I would also like to start a Gay Str8 alliance, but I am not to sure in my little preppy ass town that the yuppies and kids of yuppies will be able to handle something like that. I mean it is my civil right to hold a gay str8 club, and I know that there are some gay teachers at my school.

I think that this is my longest column ever. And my fingers are starting to hurt. If anyone has any suggestions on what to do, please drop me a email at: Alex8069@aol.com

Peace and love,


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