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Joel

December 1997

Hello Again! Merry Xmas, I hope you are all enjoying this Christmas season with your loved ones and the best stud you can find... don't we all wish, huh? Before I get to the topic of this month, which is "Image isn't everything," I wanted to share a couple of spare notes about what I have been doing these last weeks.

Well, I've been on a gay support group in which I have learned tons... If you get the chance to join one of these do so, because you don't only learn about yourself, but you also learn from others' shared experiences and it is a very good experience. You also get to meet new people which opens you more to the gay ambient.

Puerto Rico is getting more "gay conscious"... First of all, to mention the bad things, there is this proposed law to prohibit gay marriage (which is already prohibited) and to "ban" gay sex. The gay masses are letting our voice be heard, we are protesting heavily against all this and the media has been covering it (something we never used to see, but now we are more frequently). But, as a Spanish phrase says, "No hay mal que por bien no venga" (There's no bad that for good doesn't come) it means that as bad things happen, good ones do too, so the good news are that new places to go, such as clubs, are suddenly popping up in every corner. It's like a gay-craze.

Like the supposed 30% of the island population which is gay is suddenly coming out. It's amazing to go to any of these places and see the amount of people... On other notes, I've also joined a gay group at UPR (University of Puerto Rico) to protect and defend gay rights on campus and out of campus. It's more like an activist group, and I'm not even a UPR student! I'm at Sacred Heart University... which sucks badly and I'm moving to UPR ASAP... but I do enjoy helping defend our rights, because I don't want to be a spectator of the show, I want to be part of it and get the community moving to defend itself. Someone's got to do the dirty work...

This month topic, as before mentioned, is "Image isn't everything." I'm telling all this to you on personal account. Okay, let's start. I am chubby, OK? I'm not like this big thing, but I have a couple of pounds in excess. So that makes people say, 'oh, he's cute but he needs to shed them...' So, I think this... If I lose them and they like me, it would be totally stupid because I would say... "Hey, If you didn't like me then, then you can't like me now, because I am the same person."

People nowadays are so physical. They don't take time to look deep down and see who that person really is, and the worst thing of all is that I've learned this because it has happened to me a couple of times, and trust me, it is very frustrating. Let's stop judging by looks, and let's start looking more into the inner self (I sound like some self-help audio tape).

One other thing I wanted to discuss is that people tend to criticize other people a lot and they only signal their bad things... such as looks, way of walking, style, etc. Hey, criticizing is to see the good and bad things of people, don't limit it only to the bad... If you notice, we tend to say... "Oh, I am this, this, and that" and those things that person mentions are the things they lack the most... Those small details are the one we should be very careful about when meeting people, and as I said in last month column... Take time to meet other people, don't pretend to walk them down the isle in 15 minutes"...

With this, I leave you all wishing you a Feliz Navidad & Prospero Año Nuevo (Merry Xmas and a prosperous new year). Best of wishes, best of luck, Adios!

 


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