December 1997

Doing The Right Thing, Part II

After I sent in last month's column, things took a dramatic turn for the worse in my boyfriend Mike's house, and he decided to move in with me, which I've wanted him to do for quite some time. His motivation incidentally, was his little brother David.

Everything seemed to be going somewhat normal at his house, and then a few things happened that turned the place upside down. The first one was rather comical when I initially heard it, but when I became aware of the seriousness of the whole thing, I understood how bad it actually was.

David's parents were having a special dinner with David's father's boss concerning a new account for their company, one that would bring in a huge bonus for David's father. The kids had already had their supper and were to stay upstairs after greeting the guests so that the adults could talk things over. Well, David decided to bring some attention to himself and he went and took a shower, and then waltzed into the dining room with just a towel over his shoulders and asked his mother where all the clean underwear were ... giving their guest a full view of his genitals. His parents nearly went through the ceiling! To make matters worse, David insisted of making a further fool of his parents by saying "There's never any clean clothes here!" before his mother hauled him upstairs.

Somehow his parents were able talk their guest into staying, but they first forcefully dressed David and made him apologize ... and he actually refused to do it until his father started taking his belt off. He got the message. Later that night, both of his parents visited him with the belt, and although I'm not a firm believer in hitting kids as a punishment, he deserved it that time! By the way, his dresser was full of clean underwear.

Mike called me that night and asked about moving in, and the next day he started living here ... it was hard on him to leave his family like that, but I think he had enough of things!

Less that a week passed before David caused trouble again, this time by getting into a fight with another student by the public library because the other boy called him a "faggot". David beat him severely (the kid was smaller that him!) his parents threatened to file charges against him until they found out about the name calling. I think that was the final straw for his parents!

The called me that night and asked me if Mike and I could meet at a fancy local restaurant for dinner, on them. I knew something was wrong, but they told me something that was a total surprise.

They had been discussing the situation with David, looking for possible solutions, and one that came up was sending him to military school, but they felt that was the final choice. They actually had a idea, and they wanted to run it past us: How about having David like with Mike and I, and going to a different school?

At first I thought they were crazy, but then Mike's parents told us how they came up with that idea. They noticed that David totally behaved when he was around me, and also with Mike, mainly because we won't put up with any crap from him! They also pointed out that since we were living together as boyfriend and boyfriend, that maybe it would be "healthy" for David to see a positive relationship between two gay men, and use how we act as a model for himself.

I was totally flattered by that remark, because that was a sign that his parents not also accepted our lifestyle, but encouraged it. Lately, Mike's father has been very welcoming of my presence around their home, and recently during a ball game when our team won he put arm around me! It was the coolest feeling!

His parents encouraged Mike and I to discuss this in private, and give it a few days thought ... Mike told me later that he decided right then, but I needed time to think. After all, now the privacy that I wanted so badly with Mike wouldn't be there, and that's something I treasure ... but then it dawned on me that I had saved David's life not too long ago, and now maybe I could make it better for him.

The next day we went over to their house and told them "yes" and his mom kept hugging us!!! The deal is, Mike will become David's legal guardian, and right before the second semester starts, David will transfer to the local middle school where I live, which is smaller than the one he attends now. He'll visit with his psychologist on a regular basis, and also with his family, but he'll live with us full time.

David didn't seem to happy about this when they told him, so his father pulled out the military school pamphlet and told him that he could go there or move in with Mike and I ... his choice.

Right after Christmas he'll be living with us.

There are a bunch of rules he has to obey, and one of them is that he can't tell anyone at the new school that he's gay, and he also can't get into any trouble. Mike and I also have not only his parent's permission to use a belt on him if he acts up, but their blessing to do so. In the meantime, he also has to behave at school, and if he gets into any further trouble, well, as his father put it, he'll be getting used to giving lots of salutes!

Have a safe and joyous holiday season everyone!!!


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