Hello!! I guess some of you readers out there are wondering why I, a 40 year old would be writing anything for Oasis. Also I bet you are wondering how could I ever help you with any of the problems you are facing growing up gay in today's society. Well, there is one thing I think I can offer you and that is how NOT to live your life! I bet that got some responses such as: OH GOD!! another adult who is going to tell us we are wrong and are going to rot in HELL for even thinking about someone of the same sex! Well that isn't what I have to offer. I'm sorry if I didn't please some of the self-righteous people who want to condemn the gay youth of America
What I want to try to convey to you is to not spend most of your life hiding from your true self and trying to be the person everyone else thinks you should be. Be true to yourself and if that means you are gay or bisexual then try to learn to accept yourself. You have to be able to accept yourself before you can expect anyone else to accept you. I know this is not easy! I have spent the better part of my life feeling out of place trying to fit into a "normal" world. Don't get me wrong, it has not all been bad. I have a wonderful daughter and 3 beautiful granddaughters and I wouldn't trade them for anything in the world! But trying to live a so called "normal" life just wasn't fair to myself or any of my family. I am still not "out" but I am learning to be more accepting of myself. I have always been accepting of gays and bisexuals but I have never really went out of my way to try to help anyone who may have needed help in this area of their lives. I guess I was afraid if I did then my true self would have been discovered and that is something I didn't want and still don't want today. I guess that is what can be so good about the Internet, you can offer encouragement and support without having to worry about personal reprisals! It is easy to be open and free on here without worrying about what your neighbor will think.
I really think it is a shame that the better part of society cannot accept the fact that some people are gay or bisexual. I hang around with quite a few of these people in my everyday life and sometimes it is really hard for me to listen to the things that they say. I have let it be known though that it doesn't matter to me how a person lives their life. I guess this is my small way of standing up for gays and bisexuals. I know that may not be much, but you have to realize that the period of time I grew up in things were a lot different than they are today. Youth today have a lot more places they can turn if they are questioning their sexuality than they did when I was growing up. Sure I am a child of the 60's, but even with the "free love" attitudes of the era gays weren't accepted that much. I'm not saying that things are a whole lot better today, but they sure are better than they were then! When I think back to my youth I can remember the kids who were labeled "queer" because of the way they acted, walked, spoke or just because they weren't "cool". I know most of you will agree that those things haven't changed that much in the 25 years or so since I was a teenager. I truly wish it had!! I wish all the gay and bisexual youth didn't have to worry about what their family, friends, schoolmates and society in general would think if they were to tell everyone how they truly felt and who they truly loved! I wish that the gay and bisexual youth of today didn't have to hide their true feeling and keep their relationships "secret". I know this may sound corny, but to quote Rodney King: "Why can't we all just get along"
I am always happy to hear from new people so please drop me a line to let me know what you thought about what I had to say or to just say hi. My address is : OreoLuvr@aol.com I look forward to hearing from anyone who wants to take the time to write.