April 1998

Ah yet another month and another installment of me Hmm…I'm always amazed at what gets edited and what stays, but I guess that's why Jeff is the editor and I'm not. I won't bother telling you what got left out, because if it didn't make it in the first time…I imagine it won't make it this time either.

So, I still haven't figured out what I want to write for this month, but I was up half the night at an AOL party and then talking to other people on AOL. Actually I was up until like 7 am, so just bear with me. OK, so I've got to give you an update on the great boyfriend hunt. I assume that's why most of you are still reading my columns I'm looking at about three different guys this month, don't worry the tie in to AOL and the Internet is coming (can you say foreshadowing?).

So guy #1 we'll call him Ken, is a "straight" friend of mine. I know what your thinking, "Eric, straight boys don't like other boys, they like women. You're not a woman.". OK, yeah I was thinking the same thing too, but then I took him to a gay bar in Canada (the wonders of living right next door to a foreign country ). Mind you this was at his insistence, because he was "curious", well curious about what gay bars are like. So we drive over to Canada, and meet this other friend of mine from Windsor, who I met over the Internet. That guy also named "Ken" would have been #4 because we hit it off so well and we have so much in common…not to mention that we're both 23 and we both like younger guys. So needless to say, he withdrew himself from the competition. So back to the other Ken, we get to the bar and he instantly hits it off with this one guy who was like twice my age, not that that matters, just worth mentioning. So the two of them end up spending the evening together until this other group of friends comes in the bar celebrating a 20th birthday, legal age is 19 in Canada). So we join up with them and instantly our attention turns to Ken #1. Ken #2 mentions he's been staring at the strippers all evening with his mouth open no less. I swear for his sake that he's straight, then Ken #2 says when he met us at first he thought that Ken was me because his GayDar(TM) went off like right away not to mention that Ken #1 checked him out. So we ask the other four guys and they're all like, "oh yeah he's gay!" Somehow we come up with the bright idea to buy him a table dance…at first he sends the guy away saying he's straight, but like as soon as the guy leaves he wants him to come back. So tell me if you see this coming, once again Ken's mouth was wide open and lets just say he was enjoying the show We finished the evening with him and Ken #2 dirty dancing, him saying another friend of mine James was "very cute", and asking Doug if he wanted to go home with him. The whole 45 minute ride home was him swearing he was straight. In the meantime, I'm just going to wait for him to say the word. I love him to death, that's how we became friends, me thinking "God, I wish that cute guy worked here" and then finding out that he does.

Guy #2 we'll call Randy. Randy works at the bar we go to every Friday after work. We've been going there for like two months and I've been in love with him the whole time. I used to control myself around him, so to speak, because I was with my co-workers. Well I've been slipping out of the closet around them so this time I figured what the hell. Well, Randy and I hit it off very well, we have tons in common and he paid a lot of attention to me that night So we'll see this week…I may just be rewriting part of this column My only fear is that he's straight, but the woman I was with swears he's bi, said he was giving both of us looks.

Finally Guy #3, we'll call him Jerry. I first met Jerry like a week and a half ago, probably about a month by the time you read this. I met another guy over AOL and he invited me to go bowling with him and some friends one of who was this guy Jerry. I asked him who that cute blonde guy was and he said, "Oh that's Jerry and he's dating Mark, who's not here. Isn't he cute though!" Well it turns out Jerry and Mark had broken up just before I met him. So I've been like lusting after him since. The only problem is that talking to him is like talking to a wall. Sure he seems to like me, but its like pulling teeth with him. I know he's not shy, but I feel like I'm interrogating him every time I talk to him. I think he's just in that post relationship men are pigs phase. I just need to wait for him.

So the moral of the story is that AOL and the Internet seems to have done wonders for me socially, but its been leaving me high and dry when it comes to relationships. Well, last night was the AOL party which actually turned out to be really cool. Basically a couple of guys from this one chat room Michigan M4M got together and with AOL and a local bar sponsored a "party". It was a lot of fun and a great way to meet people off line you had met online. Funny thing was, I don't really hang out in AOL chat rooms. I prefer IRC (my nick is Pinto…hint, hint ). Well I had fun anyway, it seemed like a 6th grade dance when I first got there though. All the lesbians were on one side, and the gay guys on the other and no one was dancing with anyone. You'd think at basically what was a singles party, people would actually try to meet each other.

To be honest, I really wasn't "on the prowl" last night. I'm totally in love with Randy. I just hope he's not straight, like the last guy this happened with.


OK so the column is over, but before I go I'll probably be a host for the next AOL party, which unfortunately is like 4 days after this column first gets published. If you interested in going, meeting me, whatever…drop me a line…I KNOW THERE ARE GUYS IN MICHIGAN READING THIS…WHERE ARE YOU?

Now for the PS…I did go to the bar and I did see Randy again…however he was covering the pool tables so he couldn't wait on us. I told him to stop by and say hi, but he never did. In the end though, I've been waiting like 2 months for this magic moment to happen…so what's another week? Besides by the time you read this…I'll have probably had that magic moment anyway and if Jeff is nice enough to let me add something…you'll hear all about it

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