Trey and Troy

May 1998

I got a call from my lover today, saying that we were able to write an article for a publication called Oasis. He told me that our first article should focus on and about families. A very interesting subject since a lot of the people in the world say that we should not be together in the first place. I ask the question, why? Why can't we be a family, too? I am sure there are many arguments for and against. But instead of arguing, we are going to tell you about us as a family.

But first let me introduce us, my name is Troy, my lover's is Trey. Talk about confusing all our friends! I am 23 and in the banking industry and he is 26 and in the mass communications industry. We both come from different parts of the country and with different family backgrounds. I am a Florida native born in Hollywood and raised in the southern part of the state. My family liked to move every so often.

Trey was born in Clinton, Mississippi and moved to Tampa about 13 years ago. He has a very religious Southern Baptist family whereas with mine, religion was never very important. I decided to move Tampa in 1992 to attend college, where I struggled with my identity as a gay young adult. Five years later I met Trey and we have been together since. Well, enough for now, we are going to need to have something else to talk about in other articles. Let me change tense a little too, we are a couple so we should talk together.

Seeing how the focus of this issue is Families, we felt that it would be a good time to introduce our family to you. Our home, a condo in downtown Tampa, is a bright and full of cheer, fairly modern and comfortable. We like to make sure our friends feel welcome in our home. It is a place where our friends are always welcome to kick back and relax.

The term family has come to mean a lot more to us than just a mother, dad, aunts, cousins, sisters, brothers, and grandparents. Our Family has many facets to it.

Our pride and joy is Trey's daughter and Troy's stepdaughter, Faith. She is an 11 year old Yorkie. Faith is just like a young child for us. We take her to the river front park on weekends to play and chase the birds. Our other pets are fish. We have 3 different tanks, one salt-water reef and two freshwater tanks. Our family is a very important part of our lives.

One of the most important people in our extended family is Glen. He lives in the same Condo building that we do. We have dinner with Glen at least 3 times a week. Glen has been one of Trey's best friends for about 4 years now. They met at the Gay and Lesbian community Center in Tampa (both Glen and Trey are on the Board of directors). Glen is probably one of the nicest sweetest people around. He is one of those people that will be there for you no matter what.

The third group of people that we would consider our family is our friends. We both decided when we first started dating that it was very important to make sure that we kept our friends. We have seen a large number of people that get involved in relationships that just stop doing a lot of stuff with their friends. We both knew that if we were going to make this relationship last that we had to keep up with our friends.

On April 4th we celebrated our one-year anniversary. During the past year we have had to learn how to handle the same day to day issues that straight married couples have to deal with. We have to pay the utility bills every month. We have to make sure that the dog and fish get fed. We even have to plan our finances so that we can go grocery shopping, have fun around town and to go on trips to other areas of the country. There is really no difference between the two of us and a straight married couple. The main difference is that the government does not recognize our relationship and love for each other.

We hope that you will come back each month to read our column and see how a young gay couple handles being a FAMILY. We would love to get email on different types of subject you would like to see us write about. Till next month,

Trey & Troy

Trey & Troy are a young gay couple living together in Tampa Florida. They like to focus their column on the in's and out's of a young gay couples life. They have a condo in which they have their lives run by a Yorkie named Faith, and a never ending list of activities. They enjoy traveling, Sony Playstation, friends, and Troy watching Trey wait on him hand and foot. They love getting email and meeting new friends.

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