July 1998

Hey first things first, let me apologize; I know I've taken a little two month break like I promised I wouldn't. But I'm back now and god if don't have tons of stuff to write about now I guess lets start from the beginning, that would be the remainder of March and all of April. First, lets just say the great boyfriend hunt is over. No, it wasn't the totally cute waiter I was madly in love with…but more on that later. Let's see, it all began with getting a new job; yeah I no longer work at the bookstore. It was fun and all, but I felt as if life was passing me by. It was time to be grown up and have a real job. Well either that or the money wasn't good enough. Which do you think it was? Yeah, the money. It took like three months to find another job, but I finally found one the first week in April.

I'm now working for a long distance phone company. Without naming names, it's the fifth largest in the country. And if you're wondering AT&T, MCI, Sprint/WorldCom, and LCI I believe) are ahead of us…so don't even guess those I pretty much doubled my salary with the job change and now fly a desk for nine hours a day. I dreaded working behind a desk, but the money is too good and I don't seem to mind it nearly as much as I thought I would. My job title is Premier Client Support Specialist. Basically what I do is provide customer support and some technical assistance to customers who are spending in excess of $3,000 a month on communications services. Funny thing is, the way I'm going these days with my own phone bill I think I just might be one of those customers someday soon. :) So basically, I talk on the phone all day. It's a great job for a fag, plus the company I work for is really gay friendly. To be honest with you, the communications industry or any high tech field for that matter is the way to go if your queer. And yes, we're still hiring…e-mail me at bigfish758@aol.com if you're interested…of course you've got to live near the Detroit area or be willing to move there

Well enough about my job, it was about two weeks after I started working there, that my current boyfriend asked me out. Well, actually he e-mailed me and asked me out. Lets just call him Bill for right now, wait till next month to see if I remember his "name" So anyhow, I first met Bill at the beginning of the year through the support group I was going to. Well the only real reason I was going was to meet guys my age; funny thing is Bill is 29 So Bill and I had know each other for like 3 or 4 months and had been pretty good friends, but we just saw each other at the group meetings. Mind you this is the same guy who for three months heard about every crush I had, how all the guys in the bar just weren't doing it for me, and that it just seemed as if there were no men out there that appealed to me. And he still asked me out! So I figured why not, one date couldn't hurt. Well, I loved our first date, so we did it again, and again, and again; before we knew it we were spending a ton of time together and had lost track of the number of "dates". I stopped dating him a while ago, its like we just spend time together now, there's not all these date formalities anymore. We just call each other and make plans to see each other again. Sometimes he pays, sometimes I pay, sometimes we both pay. Sometimes we don't do a damn thing, but fall asleep in front of the TV together. Which brings me to my next topic…

I finally moved out of my parents house. Funny thing was, when I was hired at the new job, I had no idea how I was going to spend all that money. Well, I found a way, its called paying rent. So yeah, I'm kind of broke again, but at least I'm broke in a place of my own, not my parents house. Well, it really isn't all my own. I live with another gay guy and his dog, which has been really cool. Except for the fact that the dog is pissed he travels all the time and is getting his revenge by having accidents in the house. The worst part of it is I have to clean them up since my housemate is a way on business when the dog is pissed. It's not too bad though, for $300 a month I get a house for the most part to myself in the gay friendliest city in the Detroit area and a great dog a 9yo yellow lab) that I usually love to death. And yes, in case you're wondering, I have had sleepovers with my boyfriend in my new house. In fact, he's got toothbrush that he keeps in my bathroom The worst part of it is though, I'm usually too tired at night and all we do is sleep together. But I suppose it's better then nothing.

The roommate situation has worked out really well for me. I was worried about living with a straight guy, I mean it's one thing for my straight friends to be OK with the fact that I'm gay; but it's an entirely different issue when I bring my boyfriend home for the evening and they're really confronted with my sexual orientation. Not that that would stop me, but it would definitely create tension between the two of us. With a gay roommate, it's no issue. We both have boyfriends; in fact, when I came over the first time to see the house, he made it quite clear that he was not interested in a roommate who was interested in fooling around. I probably see his boyfriend as much as he sees mine, and the four of us get along really well. My only other option was living alone, and even though he's usually only around on weekends, it's still nice to have someone else in the house besides the dog.

What I want to close with is the issue that hit me head on when I moved out. Yes, it's my orientation. I could always turn it on and off, well a better way of saying it is I had more control over how open I was about it. Living with another gay guy, as I've already said, has been the best thing for me. But all the sudden, I realized I could no longer mute my orientation as I had been doing around the rest of my relatives. It's not like we have a rainbow flag hanging on our porch, but our house definitely has a gay feel to it. Basically it looks too nice to be a straight house, let alone it definitely reflects a gay sense of decorating; apart from the more obvious pictures in the guest bedroom. Sooner or later, my relatives are going to do the math, if they haven't already, and figure it out. It's not really fair or reasonable of me to either expect my roommate to act straight around my relatives (not that he's a flaming queen either) or to avoid having my relatives stop by and see the new place. Sooner or later, like I said they're going to do the math, and I'm going to have to face the issue. I'm ready to though, I'm too old and too set in my ways to mute my orientation any more. I'll just deal with it when it comes up.

Until next month…


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