February 1999

A little piece of mind

Hi to everyone out there, I'm Craig and I'm 18 years old from central Scotland.

Two months ago, I did the ever-dreaded event of coming out, not completely but to three of my closest friends. I've always known I was gay and for 18 years I kept it locked in a little bottle close to my heart. As I said those three little words " I AM GAY" I felt this sudden sense of relief, it was changed I felt like I was so light I was going to float up to space.

I'm sure most of you will have heard these coming out stories before but mine is just a little different -- bear with me.

So anyhow, as I shouted (I was very emotional) across the room I'm gay my friends just sort of looked at me and said "we know." Now call me stupid but even although this was a good reaction I was left gutted, here I was with the thing that had drove me nearly to suicide on several occasions and they were saying "we know." I thought to myself you know, well this information would have been handy years ago, but oh no they left me going insane for 18 years.

Now don't take me wrongly but wow it was a great reaction, I was just hoping for the big cuddle scene, or even a little shock horror..

Really the moral of this story is look at the people who are closest to you, do you really think they don't know or don't even have the slightest inkling that you are gay or lesbian. I'm not saying everybody should come out because there friends might know, definitely not, your time to come out is only when you are 100% ready.

Just one last point I'd like to make before I go which relates to the heading, When you feel that you're going insane, losing your mind etc, just remember we're all just a little bit crazy and it makes us all just a little bit more interesting.

I'm really interested to see how you feel about this feel free to e-mail me anytime on craig.m@dtn.ntl.com.

see ya, luv ya, missin ya


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