May 1999

Sorry for missing you guys last time. I was eternally busy last time and I unfortunately couldn't get my article done in time. I promise that last month was the last time.

It's All About... Me?

Well, no it's not, but since I have calmed a few issues I wanted to discuss, I decided to talk about my whole mentality. For example, at my school, (as I have said before) I am not very popular. Here's why: My hair is actually beyond my ear tops and I use no gel or spray what-so-ever in it, I dress in almost no brand clothes except for Nike and Arizona Jean Co., I wear glasses, I'm smart, I don't go out with someone just to do something sexual (but of course I can't either so...), I don't have AOL or go to chat rooms, and , as you might have already guessed, being one I almost always go for the underdog. This is my basic persona. I wouldn't mind being popular and having kids know my name even if I don't know theirs, but if they are popular because of whatever and they disagree with my feelings toward the subject, then I still wouldn't want to be popular. Now, I know being "in" and all that this is sort of contradicting, but be who and what you believe you are, not what someone or anyone else believes you are. But of course you don't always need to follow advice. Especially when the giver doesn't follow it himself.


For the past two months, my life has been stuck in a permanent spin cycle. I feel like crap one day and feel like I just ate a bowl of chocolate covered cherries with a mound of sugar poured onto them the next. But still, my goal has remained the same - find someone to help me with my "life". Now I don't need a shrink, but I do need a close friend; thank God I found one more. Since my March article, I received varied e-mails. Not to put my other avid readers down, but one remained in my brain and on my thoughts. I started receiving mail from him, and it was like no other mail I had got. Smart, knows what he wants and expects, true- these area few examples of what I believe this wonderful friend is. He wanted someone to talk with and I was more then ready to take him up on that. Since our first letters back and forth, he has intrigued me more and I want to thank him for helping me even if he didn't realize he was doing so. Thank You, Jason, for all your understanding and comfort and relation.


This hasn't exactly happened yet but I'm planning to change myself (aesthetically). I'm going to try to get colored contacts or the ones that are like year-round Halloween contacts, I'm going to try to get my hair done like Dan Wilson from SemiSonic or maybe to small braids like Josh from Road Rules does sometimes. Get a few more clothes and *POOF!* I am a new kid on the outside. I want all of this to come true because I love change... and Halloween, so if it happens I'm happy either way.

I apologize for this short and somewhat selfish article, so next month if I have no idea what to write I'll write on some topics that YOU guys want me to do. Send 'em now and I'll pick which I like the best and you'll see them in my June article. Thanks people.

Later my friends,


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