Joshua S.

October 1999

Hello all, well I have been in college for a month now, and I must say it rules. My roommate knows about my sexuality, and he thinks it's cool. I consider myself very lucky. How he found out is kind of funny. My boyfriend Curt spent the night, and my roomie didn't suspect anything until the morning when he heard one of our short bands snap...nothing was going on, but my roommate freaked and left the room as quickly as possible.

He ended up telling quite a few people on my hall, but they all don't seem to care either. Oh, and speaking of...Yes, I Joshua Scanlan have a boyfriend. I'm 19 years old and it's truly my first boyfriend. It actually took me awhile to get comfortable with saying the word "boyfriend," but as you can see.. I've gotten over that problem. I pity my friends because apparently I'm acting like some giddy little teenager. I seem to talk about my boyfriend, Curt, a little too much, and I even made him give me a hickey because I never had one. hehehe.

I joined BGLAD (bi, gay, lesbian association at Drake). As for my views on the organization, I found myself to be looking in from the outside. I couldn't help but feel that the alliance was very cliquish, and that I didn't belong. I also realized that I took homosexuality more seriously than the rest of the group. They seemed to be able to laugh at themselves and others who made fun of them, but I was deeply exasperated. I was intrigued though by the fact that only about half of the meetings are actually about gay issues. Most of the time they talk about things any group of friends would discuss. They seem to work together to show not only themselves but others that "it's okay to be gay", and homosexuality is as insignificant as the color of my eyes.

Well I'm sorry this column is so short, but school has been pretty chaotic. I just want you all to know that things do get better. Just keep fighting. I added a poem that I wrote awhile ago.. it's the most humorous thing I've ever written.. that's a hard thing for me to do. Ciao Bellas.

~Big Ole Faggot~

you curse me into oblivion
for the ones i love
those men of mine
these hard individuals
forever cock fighting fools
i spend my days prancing around
with my nail polish and those flower hats
i have a voice like a bitch
and my hands are as soft as a baby's bottom
i'm as gay as a sunny afternoon
i'm a totally decent human being
of course i'm a fag
couldn't you tell
i listen to madonna
and watch the golden girls
i like to eat tofu
and write deep meaningful poems
i searched for my happiness in a woman
doesn't that explain why i'm insane

yes i am
this big ole faggot you make fun of
as if i chose to be a minority
like i wanted to be strange
and so i live my days with hate
and just a dash of color
waiting for that day
i pick a big beefy man up on gaydar

Joshua S.

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