By Gwendolyn Holden Barry, The Holistic Lesbian
[Its always my purpose as the Holistic Lesbian to introduce the Gay -- Lesbian community to a new self awareness, self esteem and self expression through alternative healing applications, obliging an alternative lifestyle. The information in this space provides you with complimentary therapies to companion your lifestyle as a lesbian woman or gay man. Some creative tools to explore your Spirit, Mind and Body! Sound interesting?]
Do you know what sensual therapies can do for you? Have you thought: Do they really attract? Can they strengthen my will and assist me in my own self empowerment? Will they truly help me to relax or rescue me from a stressful experience? How can they soothe, nurture and heal my body?
Vital essences and even synthetic fragrances can do all of this for you! Though the collective descriptions of the psychological value of specific scents give you good guidance, these descriptions are not always applicable to you as an individual. Fragrance is a psychological memory trigger. Becoming aware of the effect specific scents have on you is your own personal aromachology. Your personal experience of specific scents are memory triggers' that are solely yours, there is a memory devoted to each. Does vanilla make you feel safe? Will patchouli make you feel amorous? Can you image a rose as you pick up its scent? Does the smell of damp woods fill you with a longing to continue whatever journey you are on? Have you noticed how scent makes you feel, or what it makes you think of? Most of us remember a scent that evokes a bad experience...finding the origin of that memory is a valuable gateway into healing some of your unwanted behavior patterns.
Let's explore some of these applications as they can apply in your alternative lifestyle!
The number one desire for the use of scent and vital essences is in their power to attract! Aromachological value of scent created the art of perfumery. A greater portion of our lives based in the aromatic effect a person, place or thing has upon us...whether we are aware of it or not. The pleasing aspect of that apartment you chose has an aesthetic companionship with aroma as well. Color has a scent to the individual mind! What does purple smell like to you? No, don't think grape! Think about the purple pina coladas you had on vacation last year or the violet shade of cold cabbage. You see; color has a scent (or two) cataloged within your memory, consciously or unconsciously. The association between color and scent is a direct memory of an experience in your past. The association between scent and feelings corresponds the same way. Collective descriptions work...however; there are some demographically unique 'collective descriptions', this is where we have the opportunity to create some new collective descriptions in recognizing what appeals to us as a community. While there are small differences from the primary collective descriptions...there are some notable gay and lesbian exceptions! Beginning with the subject of attraction is experientially fun...
We become attracted to one another through a succession of phenomena. It begins independently of touch, sight or smell with the subtle awareness of our instinct; an etheric flutter of awakening to someone or something we recognize on a soul level. Instinct is a Supra Luminal event, meaning: our Spirit, which signals our mind (or mental body) for an expression through our physical body, inspires us, faster than the speed of Light! When you pause to think about attraction and consider description as a behaviorally 'primitive' or a function of the lower / base mind, it's always helpful and rejuvenating to know that our instinct is an unfiltered message from our highest self aspect at speeds faster than Light! Ergo; attraction is one of our most spiritually pure behavior patterns!
Scent plays a significant part in the catalog of memory that impulses our instincts, especially in personal attraction. Aromatic properties are multiple: a gender, a taste, a note (top, middle or base), a psychospiritual quality and a medicinal value. Our memory responds to all of these properties. As recognition occurs, our conscious mind registers a familiar awareness and our body responds with the secretion of pheromones, heightened sensuality and often, confusion. It can register pleasure or aversion. Happening at a speed faster than Light, we become momentarily startled or confused and as we adjust, memory stimulates us towards response. At this juncture of the phenomenal succession, the tool of scent can be employed to provide us with focus, direction and attention.
The old catalog of descriptions in employing scent to attract love, relationship, intimacy, bonding, etc. are derived from a basic female-male courtship and companionship. How would a lesbian woman choose a scent to attract sensual intimacy and fulfillment? How would a gay man use scent to attract loving completion? Scent here is fundamentally a tool used to influence you, even though it may be marketed to express the value of it's effect on another...scent works on you to influence your behavior choices so you, in turn, influence all that surrounds you! Most especially, another person. The Fragrance you use in this capacity says, "I'm paying attention to you" or "pay attention to me" on many levels of conscious awareness. You choose the direction, focus and achieve the attention you are seeking. Make sense? It's the influence you create with someone else that will make the sparks fly. In all of this, always remember; you are the one scent will primarily influence, so follow your own nose!
So what collective descriptions can apply within the Gay -- Lesbian community? Lets explore a few!
Rose isn't a scent of youth. It offers less appeal to more 'earthy' personalities in matters of attraction. Demonstrative types of both gay men and lesbian women prefer demonstrative scents like patchouli, clove, violet, and tangerine. Rose will open the heartmind of a woman to her past and the cherished memory of a sustained love. This is a scent of reunion for both men and women. Blending rose in attraction combinations is tricky; the personal experience of rose will always determine the successfulness of attraction using it as a top note.
Musk is a very demonstrative scent, commonly provocative and attracting attention. In gay or lesbian attraction musk produces that "do you wanna" temptation experience. When you combine it with nutmeg, clove and styrax...lesbians sense a foundation to explore passionate sensuality because if offers a very open invitation. The gay sensibility to musk responds to combinations of top noted green scents like bay, white thyme and floras like jasmine or frangipani. Try combining a fruity fragrance like peach or raspberry...it really awakens that 'unusual' aspect. Lesbians searching for new sensual experience and easy going attitudes are attentive to musk blends.
Jasmine is a youthful bloom that silently suggests touch to most people. Jasmine awakens an intuitive love in a woman. In men, jasmine makes the mind slow down a pace and pause to observe his surroundings. Blending jasmine for a lesbian sensuality is successful with Mysore sandalwood and (of all things) a dark chocolate fragrance...this is the subtle invitation before last call. It's an exotic and exciting blend women are stunned by. Gay men enjoy jasmine within an environment, its' soothing and sentimental. And they are attracted to it on another man. In combining jasmine for gay men, the compliment might be very subtle bases such as vetiver, oakmoss, wood aloes or sandalwoods. White ginger would add to this with sexy notes of a beginning place between two very different men.
Lavender by itself doesn't usually lend its scent to attraction...it serves us as a calming agent or lessens the strain of a tension headache. Yet, combine this little flower with another like ylang-ylang and stimulate the base note with fresh angelica root and those spiked high heels spin around to search for this elusive sensuality through a crowd! Lesbians respond with 'touch me with complete passion', while men who are attracted to this kind blending are attracted to the very exotic, off the beaten path kind of a sensual intimacy.
Gardenia is a cloying, complex flora base evoking mystery in a woman, memory in a man. Lesbians are beguiled by gardenia, they respond to it with lingering memory of a woman they smell it on. If you blend gardenia with white ginger, jasmine and a bit of hyssop...she will wonder why she wants to touch you so much. This is a very lesbian blending. A gay man pays attention to gardenia trying to unravel the puzzle. While he's paying attention, try a provocative undertone in something spicy like cinnamon leaf or black pepper to ignite further attention. Melissa appeals to the adventuresome type of lesbian who wants to be enchanted by her lover. Sensitive, thoughtful men are attracted to melissa as a compliment within a romantic environment. In a lesbian blending, as the top note in a base of vetiver and wild chamomile it can sensually relax when tension or fear of intimacy exists and inspire a soulful, sincere communion in lovemaking.
Vanilla is a very potent gay ally in attraction blends...it implies erotic excitement on the gay dance floor. With patchouli, cucumber, clove and cardamom it will excite and arouse men, keeping them very attentive. Lesbians respond to vanilla in many ways, blended with honeysuckle, ginger, black pepper, magnolia and galangal it becomes exotic, awakening, demanding and sexually manifesting. Women who should wear this kind of aromatic invitation with discretion never do. Aren't you glad? Balsam woods, lingham aloes and sandalwoods are sexually impatient to lesbian women on their own. Gay men adore these scents for their warmth and invitation. Almost any blending with woods can woo a gay man! When you combine ylang-ylang, neroli and clary sage to them, woods mature, grow confident and intoxicate lesbians with openings into hidden sensualities and intimacies.
Latino's adore Neroli, the blossom of the orange tree. Latino lesbians love the blend of neroli and jasmine speaking intimate relaxation, sexual abandons... an invitation to dance! Neroli is a light, sensitive pleaser to most anyone; it endears and remains true in the heart. Romance in the lesbian or female heart responds to blends of the Violet leaf. Many gay men use violet blends after bath and shower; it rejuvenates and awakens personal presence. This has been a staple in feminine love blends for thousands of years...because it works! On the isle of Lesbos, Violet leaf was combined with vetiver, patchouli, bay laurel, vanilla and (watch this!) oregano to arouse and prolong...a sexually inexhaustible blending.
The greening of Rosemary speaks to all hearts about the joy of yesterday and can bring the return of love. Its cleanliness heals the heartmind with forgiveness and clarifies the future. To combine rosemary into an attraction blending you can employ rose with success and a bit of lily, thyme, and some jasmine also to recapture a love lost or create the reunion of true love. Rosemary inspires us all to calm down and think things over carefully. Basil will bring us all new love (and money!). Basil combined with the lovely presence of Aphrodite's myrtle, rose, patchouli, melissa and ambrette seed (hibiscus) is the open invitation to notice, pay attention and take action toward intimate new relationship for gay men and lesbians. I think it works on heterosexual folks too!
Patchouli has been used for thousands of years to evoke a feeling of security and sense of grounding. It smell's much like rich earth! (Many old formulas for aromatic 'spells' referred to patchouli as "graveyard dirt". It awakens our sense of home and instills a peace within.) It is the scent of our home, Gaia...the living planet. To fulfill its attractive sensual abilities patchouli does best when combined with other qualities of sweet, green or wood scents for women. Demonstrative, adventuresome lesbians are attracted to this blending. Sweet floras and tangy fruits attract gay men in combinations of patchouli as the base note.
Fragrance awakens, soothes, attracts, heals the body and stimulates brand new awareness. The one overall rule in the application of fragrance for your own self esteem, relaxation, rejuvenation, tools of attraction or exploration of the inner self is to always follow your own nose! Learning these collective descriptions on the application of specific scents helps us to find our own beginning places with the uses of fragrance. You can fill your environment dispensing with an aromatherapy lamp, infuse your bath, perfume your body or even your bed with fragrances that will serve you in accomplishing a desired feeling or intentions. Always following your own instincts...those little messages from your highest self!