I found out last night from tumblr that my girlfriend is having doubts in our relationship from an anonymous question she asked a blog. I never go on there. I have only been on there the last couple days. She thinks I never use it. I usually don't. But I saw it.
My innocence is breaking. That feeling of young love and bursting feeling is disintegrating into memories where people find it later in their lives wondering what had happened.
It's been over a year since my last post! Things change a lot. It is really unbelievable. I need a place to express feelings inside of me where no one can see them. I miss this place. I used to write all the time cause I felt crazy and it helped.
I just have to adjust. I love withdrawing. I use to be such an independent person! I guess I have to work on that again -_- I'm excited for halloween.
Is anyone dressing up, and who will you be?
Me and my girlfriend are going to be tigerlily and peterpan; I'm tigerlily (I'm already native american haha) and she will be peter pan! She has short hair and she died it brown-red just for her costume, she is so cute :D I can't wait, it's going to be awesome.
Hey people, everyone here is probably new and don't know who I am; it's been a long long time since I've posted. In fact it's a pattern of mine to only post when I'm troubled or depressed. So I suppose it's a good thing I've been absent for awhile. Probably over a year.
Only because my girlfriend's parents found out. I was freaking out and hyper-ventilating and everything and my hands went numb. I knew my parents wouldn't care. We were in the car when I told them. They're both fine, my dad said "I suspected a long time ago anyway" and that he was waiting for me to tell them and he's happy I decided to. They both love me the same way and my dad even said "In these days it's not that big of a deal, I mean, WHOOPDEE DOO" it makes me so happy. They kept reassuring me but I was still super freaked out and cried for a bit. This was a couple weeks ago.
My girlfriend's parents found out about us. It wasn't as bad as we thought, they are OK with it, but they don't encourage it. They met me once hardly, and they're already judging me. They won't let us sleep over at each other's houses anymore, even though we have every weekend for the past month before they even knew. It doesn't make any sense. They're stupid. Right now it is the saddest thing. I hate them.
My best friend came over on Friday and we haven't hung out in months. We barely even talk. We don't fight and we haven't fought but sometimes we just go long periods without talking to each other and it doesn't help that her new house doesn't have signal so she can't text. I always think she has plenty of other times to text me because she goes to school each day, she has a car and can drive, and sometimes I get sad because she knows where I am. I'm here. And she can't find time to talk to me or come over. But hopefully that will change now.
has a new cd :O :O :O
my favorite band.
I have a girlfriend now :D
It's been one year since I started liking her. It's been 11 months since we started talking.
She's coming over tomorrow :D :D :D :D
The weekends are all I look forward to, it's the only time we see each other, for now anyway. I'm excited.
First day of my life.
in prison, accused of telling the truth.
im getting depressed again.
I'm a loser and a user so I don't need no accuser to try and slag me down because I know you're right SO GO DO WHAT YOU LIKE
i love that song.
Tonight is the last official night of summer o_o and what did I do? HOMEWORK T_T but that's ok, I wasted plenty of other days not doing homework. Tomorrow I'll finish it. I'm halfway done. Tomorrow I'll be going to bed semi-early, it kinda sucks. At least I don't have to go to school until around 1130, yay sophomores :P
Where did my best friend go? I'm lonely. Pitifully lonely. It makes me want to cry. It's funny when you have someone you don't mind being lonely, you like it. When you don't have anyone, when you don't have anything for comfort, to fall back on, you hate it. At least I do. I don't know what happened. Nothing is wrong.....but at the same time everything is wrong. I feel abandoned and like she doesn't even care about me. I don't even care about me. But still, what did I do wrong? I don't know anymore, but I'm sad. I have other friends. But it's not the same.
So we finally hung out. And I had three of my other friends over. And then they left. And it was just me, her, and my other friend. They spent the night. We watched five movies. FIVE it was six in the morning when we went to bed. We sat together but.....I think we were both too nervous to do anything. We didn't really touch at all. But she slept in my bed. And after twenty minutes of laying there without moving I finally put my arm around her and she held my hand around her waist and it was like that most of the night. And it's the first time I've felt another human being's warmth.