Her body is the marriage of grace and sex. It's there amongst the music of her speech and the noise of her distance from my hand. It bends to imitate the ways of lovers in bed and sways like that of a dancer. Her body falls into my bed and "come," it says. Too much for my brain to behold, my body retreats.
Hmm.. what to talk about? I don't know, I guess I'll just write something about a girl I'm in love with. I might as well..
Today was a good day. I haven't had one of those in a long time. It was also pretty strange because it feels like I'm missing chunks of time. I sort of spent the entire day in a foggy, time-warp thing. I'm having a really hard time focusing on one thing.. I feel like my mind and body are separate, like my mind exists outside of my body.
Hmm, what's going on in my life? Besides being on the brink of suicide twice in one week, nothing really.. I keep thinking something is wrong with me.. I think I may have Asperger's Syndrome.. other than that, I really have nothing to write about.. Nothing at all..
I feel a little silly for asking these questions, but this is a blog thingy so, I suppose this is an appropriate place to post these burning questions I have for myself. Well, the questions are "who am I really?" and "why am I unable to understand myself?" These are questions that I've placed in the back of my mind and haven't attempted to answer.
The blank white page
conjures fear and terror
and the words comfort.
We have questions
with answers buried
contained in the black.
It engulfs and enfolds and encloses.
unharmed and transformed and hated.
that have been built with sweat and devolution
will result in death.
With the moon on my tongue, I
taste bitterness and rejection.
Okay, I wrote something earlier today, well, yesterday, but I felt the need to write again, so here I am.. It's, like, 2:40 in the morning now and I'm not supposed to be on the computer now, but who cares?
Let's see.. just in case someone is actually reading this, I'll take the time to introduce myself.. Well firstly, my name is Alicia. Funny thing about my name: one's pronounced like "Aleesha" and the other is pronounced like "Aleesia." My name's pronounced like the second one. What else?