carmen143's picture

I just...

Dispatched some justice on Harry Potter Scene It.

I totally kicked my sister and her friend's asses!!!

Feelin good right now.

Love kicking ass at board games.

Especially Harry Potter related things.

I know I'm a nerd but hey. :) Its fun being a dork.

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New Friend?

So I'm on Facebook and I get an IM from this girl, Olivia.

We start talking and she seems really cool.

I guess I made a good first impression as well and she asked if I wanted to hang sometime.

Oh and she asked if she could sit at my lunch table.

Now I know I shouldn't jump the gun and assume something.

Maybe she really just wants to be friends.

But I've heard she's bi... So... :)

We shall see what happens.


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I realize...

That I feel kind of out of place among my straight friends who are girls.

Like my friends Kelly and Jenna were talking about how I sit by one of their crushes in two classes.

They would say things like "Oh Carrie I wish I was you!!!"

Which is stupid because if they were me, they wouldn't like a guy in the first place...

I don't mind listening to them talk about. Thats not the awkward part.

Its just about not being able to relate to them.

And I can't really talk about how lonely I am around them cause they don't really get it.

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Small Wins for Today.

I got my first A on an Algebra quiz!

Studied my ass off and I finally got paid for it. Thank god. XD

Also another small win..

This girl in my gym class is really hot.

Why is this a good thing you may ask...


She showed me this tattoo (not a really one) that her cousin drew on her stomach.

It was on, I guess the hip bone.

Kinda like if she pulled down her shorts anymore I would see... Well you get the idea.

Also she pulled her shirt up really high... Oh geez.

Needless to say I lost the ping pong game we were playing. Lol.

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Everyone Has Something To Hide Cept Me and My Monkey.

My ex decided to post GOD AND JESUS LOVES YOU all over Facebook.

Whenever anyone talks directly about religion I just feel really awkward.

It seems that whenever she doubts in her sexuality or just feels shitty, she taps into her "Jesus" power.

Now don't get me wrong. I'm Catholic and Jesus is cool with me.

But when people shove it in my face... I get kinda freaked out.

I don't know how to act around her.

She really wants to be friends.

But whenever I'm around her I feel like I'm gonna puke...

So I'm avoiding her...

Is that the right thing to do?

I dunno...

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Well Tophat... You Were Right.

I broke up with my girlfriend.

Here's how it went down:

She asked me why I broke up with her last year...

I said because we never saw each other and my parents told me to.

She then said that we wouldn't work and that I was a mistake.

So i told her I was breaking up with her.

Then she started saying things like I love you and we can make it...

So I'm just done...

I'm sorry for wasting your time if you read my whiny journals about this girl earlier... I'm really sorry.

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If I...

Break up with my girlfriend because she doesn't want to hold my hand at school... Does that make me a bad person?

Because I'm totally cool with her wanting to not do that at school...

But I don't see her on weekends.

This might sound bad but I'm getting antsy...

I really love her and I want to be with her... I dunno what to do.


carmen143's picture



My girlfriend had to insult me really badly to prove a point.

She claims I have no backbone and don't stand up for myself...

Which I don't stand up for myself but is that such a bad thing?

Pretty much I'm a human doormat.

But that's just myself.

My girlfriend should respect this and not insult me...

I love her but sometimes... =/

Oh yeah. And I got a D- on my algebra 2 quiz.

So far this week has seriously sucked.

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So... is this a problem?

So lately...

I've been really tired.

Also I'm starting to not really want to do school work (Not really caring)...

I don't think I'm depressed... But... Then again... I dunno.

Anyone have advice?

I could really use it.

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Just a forewarning this a post full of bitching so...

My girlfriend doesn't want any physical contact with me...

I have a feeling this isn't a good thing.

On the one hand, I understand the reluctance of PDA at our school. But no hugs at school? Really?

You claim that I "get to close" when I hug you but I do that because I LOVE YOU. And I want to be close to you.

I also understand that you don't want people to think you're gay.

But I really want us to be a normal couple...

I want to brag about you.

I want to hold your hand and walk the hallways...

Oh well.

What can I do?

carmen143's picture

I just had to put this out there.

I LOVE MY GIRLFRIEND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Okay sorry guys I had to do that.

See no one is allowed to know about my girlfriend but I just had to tell you guys.

Now I have some questions.

If anyone of you are or were in a relationship did you:

Go around holding hands/any PDA at all or was your relationship a secret?

Also, Did people know or was it more under wraps?

I'm just wondering how I should treat my relationship.

I know I shouldn't worry so much, just let it happen, but advice would be nice. :D

Thanks guys!!

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Its Official.

I asked her out and she said yes!

Now if I can just find a way to see her on weekends... Lol.

But hey, we'll figure it out. XD

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I Learned...

How to drive a stick shift car.

And I totally rock at it. XD

I'm sooooo great. I only stalled a few times and I'm great at shifting.

Technically I don't get my permit for a few more months but it was fun to just drive around with my dad.

I also had my snare lesson and a piano party today.

Snare went well. Its such a fun instrument.

Piano party is basically all my teacher's students coming together playing some pieces, eating cookies and drinking punch,

And I ran into one of my old friends from my old school.

I was fun to catch up with him.

So far great weekend.

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One quick thing I just witnessed.

"I'm not gay, I'm bi-larious!!!!"

Oh 30 Rock is the best thing ever!!!!!

carmen143's picture

I need some advice guys. Lots of it.

My girlfriend and I can't hang out except at school...

Her and parents don't like me and my parent's don't like her...

Romeo and Juliet.


Does anyone have some advice on how we can see each other??

Should I confront her parents?

Should we sneak around??

I dunno what to do.

I really love this girl...

Please help.

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