On Friday, one of my professors told me I had a nice speaking voice. I was honestly really, really shocked since I've always been incredibly self-conscious of my voice. There's some quality to it I don't really like that I can't quite place. It's not what I'd think of when I think of an "annoying" voice, but there's just something about it. (I've found that it's not nearly as bad as it could be, though. I've met a few girls with really shrill, screechy voices, and I'm glad I don't have that! I'm also glad that I have no traceable accent; no one has ever guessed where I used to live, and I've had more than a few people be totally surprised upon finding out.) But yeah, he said that it was calming and that it will serve me well. Definitely an unexpected compliment.
Today was my birthday. It was the best birthday I've ever had, even though I have a macroeconomics test tomorrow morning, so I have to study some more tonight. I'm actually in the library right now, but I'm taking a break because this guy across the room keeps coughing annoyingly. I know he can't help it, but it's the exact same hacking cough, over and over, like every 30 seconds on the dot. I got so many presents in the mail from my mom that I had to make two trips to the mail room. So much candy and some boots and some nice clothes that I still need to try on. I haven't gotten that many presents since I was in elementary school and still having those birthday parties where you invite your whole class.
So, I have a presentation later today. It's my first one, so I'm a little nervous, especially because I have to start off. (I picked being the person who starts off, though, because it gave me the easiest portion of the information. I think it was a fair trade.) We had to do a practice-run in front of the TA last night, and that went pretty well, I think. She actually said I did a really good job, except I'm not quite loud enough. I have a really quiet voice. In high school, we had to take a speech class, and I'd always get B's even though the content of my speeches was admittedly better than almost everyone else's because I just couldn't make my voice loud enough. The TA said I was the most prepared person of my group, though, so that was good. I like my group members, even though there's one guy who doesn't really do enough.
It was quiet this weekend because pretty much everyone who lives in the northeast went home for the Columbus Day break. And even though my roommate is from California and therefore couldn't go home, she wasn't here for a while because she went on a little day trip all day Saturday. So I got to do whatever I wanted. I did some exploring on Saturday. Walked around the city a bit. (Well, until it started sprinkling and raining.) That was refreshing. I really like the fact that I can just walk around and look at things now, if that makes any sense. There wasn't anywhere to walk or anything nice to look at in my hometown. Oh, and that girl I accidentally upset is talking to me again, so that's a good thing. I feel really relieved about that because I can't stand it when people are mad at me. It always makes me feel like the world's biggest asshole. And now I don't feel like I should hide from my neighbors anymore like I've been doing for the past week. Very, very relieved.
My conversation with Cute Blonde Girl this morning took an interesting turn. I was telling her about some of my friends, and I mentioned how I have this one friend from high school who is talking to me again after ignoring me for a while. But literally all that friend cares about now is nerdy guys. (Yes, this specifically. They can only be nerdy guys. No other kinds. I guess it's kind of like me with blonde girls.)
I should be sleeping, but I don't have class until 2 tomorrow, and I'm enjoying some alone time while my roommate is out doing god knows what. I've been listening to a lot of full albums lately. My personal favorite right now is Brand New's "Your Favorite Weapon". (Can you guess which song off the album is my favorite?)
I really need to make some friends who aren't on my floor. Well, I guess Cute Blonde Girl counts as my friend by now, sort of? Maybe? Yeah, I'm gonna count her. And she definitely doesn't live here, so let me rephrase that: I really need to make some friends who aren't on my floor and who I'm not attracted to.
My floormates are nice and I like most of them, but I'm around them pretty much 24/7. And several of them are really nosy, which annoys me a lot. Well, except my roommate, thankfully. I like her even though our personalities are vastly different. She's great because she never asks why my alarm goes off at 7 every Sunday or wonders why I change outfits a million times almost every morning or questions me when I'm on the internet laughing at nothing.
So, yeah, Sunday's update. I didn't post because I was studying for a test. Contrary to false speculations by certain site owners, I did not get laid. Although a certain cute blonde girl did randomly mention that she hates wearing pants...
I stressed a LOT because she took a really long time (like, a whole day) to text me back. I was like, 12000% convinced that she secretly hates me, but it turns out she was just studying! She always puts smiley faces and multiple exclamation points in her texts. It's the cutest.
I seriously sat there and had a two-hour long conversation with her without any awkwardness at all, and the only people I'm ever able to do that face-to-face with are like, my best friends for years. And I couldn't stop smiling the whole time because she's just so goddamned adorable. She makes the cutest little expressions and says the cutest stuff and I just can't even handle it, oh my god. My face hurt so badly from smiling at her so much by the time I left.
As I mentioned, I had plans with Cute Blonde Girl this morning. I had to wake up really early. Like, I don't think I've EVER woken up that early on a Sunday. But I didn't even care. I was like ultra nervous, though. I was running around trying to get ready without waking up my roommate, and I ran into my RA in the hall and it was really awkward and I was scared he was totally judging me because who gets up at 7 on a Sunday morning? I put on legit makeup and everything, even though I'm often too lazy to do much more than mascara and lip gloss.
I, Super Duck, queen of social awkwardness, am possibly/probably/hopefully hanging out with the girl I like this weekend. Wait... What's that noise? The sound of all of your jaws collectively hitting the floor in shock? Yeah, I'm pretty shocked too. It's just coffee, and I don't even know if it's a "date" or not, so I'm hesitant to call it that.
I've been here about a week now, and I love it so far. (Disregarding that one crappy party, haha.) Everyone on my floor is awesome. We do everything together. But they're kind of my only friends except for that one girl from the Facebook group, so I think I need to branch out a little since I'm with them 24/7. My classes are going decently so far too. I don't hate any of them that much yet. The only real complaints I have are that it's really, really hard to shave my legs in the dimly lit showers and sometimes I forget to eat unless someone invites me out.
And can I just say that the girls here are unbelievably attractive? I'm like a freakin' kid in a candy store! Sometimes when I'm walking to class, I'll try to count the hot girls, but I'll always lose count. There's even a hot girl on my floor. I didn't see much of her for a few days, but now she has started hanging out with the rest of us, so yay! I also once saw a hot girl wearing a pro-gay shirt, and I've noticed her around campus a few times since then. And also, I joined several clubs at the club fair thing, and I happened to see the name of this really hot bi girl from the Facebook group on one of the mailing lists, so there's a chance I could get to talk to her soon. Now that would be amazing.
But I write because I have encountered... a problem.
It reminded me of high school, so I changed it.
A couple weeks ago, I made a post about how my sister almost ruined my mom's relationship, but I deleted it because it was really angry and also because my mom and her boyfriend made up. To condense the story, he's been in North Carolina for his job, and he and my mom want to live there permanently, so they have been looking at houses there together. My mom has been saying for months now that she was going to move there as soon as our house sold. But now, just to appease my sister, she's going to postpone it a year. (She won't just leave my sister with my dad because she thinks he has too much on his plate with his fiancee's two really obnoxious kids.)
Tonight is my last night in Boston for about two months until I move in for school. Unfortunately, I made the grave mistake of wearing cute shoes to orientation, so my feet were too blistered to do any last-minute exploring today. I'm not really used to walking everywhere since I live in the middle of absolutely nowhere, and there isn't exactly anything to walk to. But I like the walking because then I don't feel so bad if I have a cookie or a soda or something. And also I hate driving more than anything ever, so there's that. (Is it even possible to gain the Freshman 15 at a school here? I think you'd have to actively try to do it. So much walking.) I'm finally getting enough water here, too, I think. I'm bad about not getting enough, but all of the walking kinda necessitates it. And the best part of all is that the tap water is actually drinkable. (The tap water in my hometown is disgusting, and in the bigger-but-still-tiny nearby town, it's actually brown! Ewww.) After I move here, I will probably never feel fat again, haha.
I definitely wish I had ended my speech with that, haha.
So, I graduated! Everything went surprisingly well. (The hat and I were absolutely not friends, though. It messed up my hair so much.) Giving the salutatory speech was beyond nervewracking, though. When I got onstage and looked out into the audience, for some reason, I thought this girl in the very back was FCG, so it freaked me out big time. I later discovered that the girl was not, in fact, FCG, but I couldn't tell that from the stage. (It was possible that she could've been there. She's apparently still friends with IG.) Despite my nerves, I actually gave the speech with minimal problems. I messed up once because I started reading the wrong line, but it was only a little mistake, so it wasn't that big a deal. And I didn't trip going up the steps or walking across the stage!
A lot of the other girls cried, but I didn't. I'm so glad to get out of there. I can't even begin to put the feeling into words.
I've had an eventful past couple of weeks, I suppose. Guess whose last day of high school is May 8th!? MINE! And only Tuesday day is a full day. Monday is a half day, and Wednesday is like one class only. Graduation isn't until the week after next, but my last day of actual classes is the 8th. After that, there's only the AP English exam. And now I don't have to go into school until 10 a.m. because my dual enrollment class ended. It doesn't feel like this is actually happening to me, you know?
I got my third college acceptance letter last week, so that was nice. I am not going to that school, though, but I'm still glad I got accepted. I know I'm not going to that one because on Saturday morning, I got a fourth letter. This one was from Boston University. Not only did I get into BU, but I also got their Presidential Scholarship along with an absolutely AMAZING financial aid package. I'm so happy!
Well, things are not so bland anymore at all. Wow. And yes, this is related to The Girl, but it's bad for me. There has been a new... development, so to speak. It won't get out of my head. I learned a hard lesson this week, friends: IGNORANCE IS BLISS!
This post is long and kinda weird, just so you know. I'll be impressed if you read it all. I needed to write it out because I think I will go insane if I don't. I kind of feel like I will anyway, which is terrible because I only have 2 and a half more months of school left! I can't go insane now. I'm almost home-free, almost to somewhere normal, but it's like the universe can't let me out of here I without one last really stupid obstacle.