So my mom's boyfriend/not-boyfriend/whatever is here. No idea how long he's staying. My mom made me go out to eat with her and all her friends tonight before he got here so she wouldn't have to go alone. Dude, he just played this video for my mom, and a girl was talking on it, and she sounded EXACTLY like me, but it wasn't me. It was freakyyy.
I started studying for the AP exam today. Well, not really. By "started studying," I mean opened a textbook, read one page, and then watched the following video:
So, the moods in this journal are EXTREMELY varied. I'm just all over the place right now, and it may or may not make any sense. I can't even sit still right now. Just a warning.
I am extremely sensitive to noises. My mom eats so loudly. Earlier, she was sitting on the couch, disgustingly smacking her salad, and I thought I was going to lose it, even with headphones in and music turned up loud. She is also a SUPER slow eater, which makes matters so much worse. She and my sister both eat that way. Certain noises really get to me for some reason. I also can't be near vacuum cleaners, my sister when she slurps soda out of a can, IG when she tries (and fails) to whistle, or people who enjoy sucking their snot back up into their nose.
It's usually not anywhere near this bad, but I'm at my breaking point right now, so everything is upsetting me. I wanted to scream and lash out at Mrs. History Teacher today because she's giving us work for a grade tomorrow on stuff she says she knows we haven't covered, but we can't look the info up anywhere. I'm sorry, but what the fuck? What the fuck is that? What does she even expect us to do? Pull the info out of our asses?
So, tomorrow, we have this gross thing called Field Day. It's basically like gym class, except it lasts two hours. No one really likes it except the jock guys, who proclaim it serious business and take out any fun that could possibly be had anyway. Each grade is pitted against the others, which is annoying because a lot of my friends are in other grades, and I can't get near them to talk to them while Field Day is going on. We are, however, permitted to wear shorts to school tomorrow, which could potentially make for some good eye candy...
I often skip Field Day, but I'm not sure if we're having classes before Field Day, and I need to see FCG if we do. Sometimes we only have the ones before lunch, which would suck horribly because my class with FCG is directly after lunch while the one I hate with a passion and often leave close to tears from is directly before lunch. Sometimes we do short classes and have them all. We usually did the former in middle school except one year, but I can't remember what we did last year. (Also, my mom is letting me save my 3 free absences for the hellish week after the AP Exam. I told her there was no reason for me to ever, ever go back after next Wednesday, but sadly, you get 3 free absences per quarter, not 1235645241, so I can't do that.)
So, I had to go by my mom's friend's house, and on the way home, I passed by IG's boyfriend. He was out walking and carrying his skateboard. It was awkward because we know each other because of IG but don't really talk. I was at a stop sign, so I was kinda stuck. Haha. Don't you just hate that awkward eye contact you make when you see someone you kind of know but aren't really friends with, and neither person is really sure if they should wave or not?
Mr. Troll the economics teacher, while usually irritating, is the one of the only useful people at school right now. Today, he said that the seniors in our class had to go ahead and take their test soon because next Wednesday is their last day to get grades and stuff. Finally, Mr. Troll serves a purpose! So, I guess I have a couple extra days with FCG, then. This is good, but it also means I have a couple of extra days (plus an entire extra weekend) to dread Wednesday. I just can't stop thinking about how much it's gonna suck when my FCG leaves. :'( If Mr. Troll is right, then I have 6 more days with her now instead of 3. Everything is such a huge clusterfuck. I wish they'd just make a clear announcement stating when the seniors' last day is so I can adjust my level of panic accordingly. Of course, with my luck, he could be trollin' again, and it's not next Wednesday. He would so totally do that if he knew how much I have to have this information.
Old Crush was... interesting... today. She is also completely and utterly useless when it comes to giving vital information. I should've figured that since the girl barely ever makes any sense at all. I wanted to be absolutely sure when my last day with FCG is. I'm still 99% sure it's this Friday, but that guy in chemistry keeps saying next Thursday.
Old Crush: YES THIS IS MY LAST FULL WEEK OF CHEMISTRY
Me: Jealous. When is the seniors' last day of school?
Old Crush: Well, I'm not really sure. It's either this Friday or next Monday, Tuesday, or Wednesday.
THANKS FOR YOUR HELP, OLD CRUSH. "Next Monday, Tuesday, or Wednesday" doesn't tell me anything!
Then, the guy who sits in front of me was annoying me. He decided to use my desk as a pillow, and he's sort of gross.
So, my mom's new boyfriend is coming over Easter night, and he's staying until Tuesday. I don't know how I feel about this... I don't know this dude, and I don't know if I want to deal with having to be hospitable to some stranger during an extremely stressful week.
I still have my dad's laptop. We haven't had a chance to take mine to the repair shop yet. It's never open when we go there. :( I liked having my dad's laptop until I wanted to draw, installed my graphics tablet, and then realized I didn't have any of my programs I use. I didn't want to install a bunch of shit on his laptop, so I didn't go get them back...
Yay, I have no school tomorrow! But there are also bad things, like the fact that a chemistry test (my worst subject, even!) is scheduled for next Friday. Next Friday is already a terrible, awful, pathetic excuse for a day. And guess what? Even though almost half of the class is seniors and will be leaving on that day, we still might apparently have another test after that. Umm, no. I flat out refuse to do any stupid chemistry tests without any Old Crush eye candy.
Also, today, my math teacher, who is one of the only teachers I have that doesn't make me want to repeatedly slam my head in my car door, revealed to us today that she has cancer. Aww. :( Girl Best Friend and I have suspected that something was wrong with her for a while now since she's older (mid/late 60s) and misses so much school.
Then, there were things that were technically bad but resulted in good stuff. There was a surprise French quiz today that no one knew about, and I had forgotten my study guide, so FCG let me share hers. Of course, this meant that I had to sit very close to her while we studied, which, in turn, meant that I didn't absorb a damn thing I studied. Oh well! She was so cute trying to pronounce the words. And our faces were so, so close. Unfortunately for me, "FCG has the most beautiful eyes ever in the universe" was not an answer choice on the quiz.
So, my dad has let me borrow his laptop until mine is fixed because he hardly uses his, plus there's an old yet still usable desktop computer at his house anyway. I am really, REALLY enjoying his computer because it is about half as old as mine. Mine is really and truly fucked now. We tried everything, and we can't fix it, so tomorrow we're taking it to a store that fixes computers. (I don't have school tomorrow!) He said that if it costs a lot, he might just go ahead and get me a new one. The thing is 3 1/2 years old... Won't be long before I actually need a new one anyway. I'd LOVE to have a new one, but I know it's so not happening! My dad says that the only way I'll get a new one is if it costs over about $150 to fix the old one. I wouldn't mind keeping the old one if I could somehow magically get it to run like a newer one.
Dude, when they fix your computer, do they, like, snoop in your files and stuff? My laptop is THE most personal item I own, so I put all the important stuff on an external drive and deleted it off the laptop out of paranoia. I know they've more than likely seen far, far worse things than I would ever have on my computer since I'm not really into weird shit. I mean, it's not like there's tentacle Nazi scat porn on there or anything, it's just the principle of the thing.
Hey, guys, I just wanted to tell you that this morning, the universe decided to rape my laptop in the ass. I'm at my grandparents' house right now, typing a paper, so I thought I'd just tell you all. If my dad can't fix it, then... Uhhh, I don't know.
The laptop made some weird buzzing noises over the past few days, and now it only turns on for a few minutes at a time before shutting off. Apparently, that means there might be an issue with the fan or something. My dad's pretty good with electronics, so I'll ask him about it. I tried using that canned air stuff to spray the dust out of what I could see of the fan, but apparently it's better to open the laptop up and do it? I'm NOT opening it without my dad.
So, tomorrow, barely any of my teachers are gonna be at school. It will be awesome. And now the history test is COMPLETELY CANCELLED! All we have to do is a take-home worksheet and a stupid essay now. No test.
I'm not doing the Day of Silence tomorrow. Sorry guys. I did it in 7th grade, was too intimidated by an ultra-conservative history teacher in 8th grade, and forgot in 9th grade. But now I honestly don't think I could shut up for an entire day, plus I'm now down to just a few days left with FCG and can't afford to completely not talk to her for a day.
Dude, I want to go shopping. I love summer clothes. Hahaha. There is so much shit in my closet that is like, 5 years old and doesn't even fit anymore. I cleaned it out a lot last year, but there is still a bunch of stuff in the back. IG says she's going shopping this weekend. Jealous. I don't have much money, though, so I guess it doesn't matter anyway!
Anyway, FCG started a long discussion about boobs today in class. Yes, really.
Earlier today, I finally texted FCG, reminding her to bring that stuff. She responded instantly. Like, I didn't even have time to text the other girl I was also supposed to remind before FCG responded. But she didn't say anything after that, so bleh. I think she said she was going somewhere tonight, though, so it's alright. I didn't really start a conversation with her, I just reminded her to bring those things. And I was actually nervous over that for like, 5 whole minutes. Hahaha... Wow, I am so lame. Yeah, I think I'm back in my usual position of Supremely Lame again. The universe has gone back to normal.
I am always soooo nervous to text or call girls I like. It's why I was such an epic failure with the last girl I liked. It's so weird because I can talk to them in person just fine without being nervous or anything, but using the phone is somehow scary. I can never think of what to say to them to start a conversation on the phone or over text, even though I talk to my other friends on the phone or over text alllll the time. It feels weird to just say hi. Like I'm always scared they won't want to talk to me or something.
HOLY SHIT, YOU GUYS! There is a small piece of paper next to me, and it has awesome, awesome things written on it, but I can't tell you what's on it yet. You have to hear the entire story first. It was initially too much awesome for me to behold, and I kept checking it repeatedly to make sure it was not a figment of my imagination, but it's real! It's really real! Despite knowing this, I still keep looking at it over and over and over and over to make COMPLETELY sure I am not hallucinating.
So, this morning, I woke up feeling inexplicably amazing. When I got to school, my English teacher revealed that we wouldn't do anything for the rest of the week since the juniors are gathering stuff to decorate for prom, and we can't get too far ahead of them. (If you remember, 10th grade honors is the exact same thing as 11th grade regular at my school, so she teaches both groups.) She also made brownies, and I ate three because they were small and also super freaking epic.
Then, my history test, which was scheduled for tomorrow, was moved back a day. Now I can study chemistry tonight. I did probably fail my economics test, though, which did suck a lot. Oops. But that's okay! I am convinced that my economics teacher is a real-life troll. Not even kidding. That test was just... Wow. And we had to do the other class's punishment! What the fuck!?
AND NOW FOR THE PART YOU ACTUALLY WANT TO HEAR!
FCG was worried that she looked fat in the play. I said that she never does, but IG decided to mess with her and tell her that she did. (And yet, she still talks to IG more than she talks to me...) She, of course, had a fit. I kept telling her that she didn't, but IG wouldn't stop. Then, we somehow started talking about awkward preteen years, and FCG said that when she was in middle school, she was just so disgusting and awful and stuff. Somehow, I am unable to believe this.
Me: But you are so pretty now! I doubt you've ever looked awful a day in your life.
FCG: But I'm not, and I have!
Me: Nooo... I'd have to see it to believe it.
FCG: I'm never showing anybody a picture from then! EVER!
Awww... I wouldn't make fun of her even if she was once the most awkward preteen on the planet. I adore her. And she couldn't have been any worse than me! When I was 12, I was about 30 pounds overweight, and I dressed only in shirts with annoying sayings on them. My clothes also never fit. I'd wear shirts that were like, two sizes too big because I thought it would conceal the fact that I was really, really overweight, but it didn't. I spent all my free time either on Neopets or drawing emo cats. I don't think it gets any more awkward than that. Hahaha.
So, this girl who takes pictures for the school newspaper and yearbook just uploaded literally like 500 pictures from the senior play and put them on facebook. Some of them are of FCG sort of doing what she was supposed to. At least her smile could possibly, maybe, kind of trick someone who didn't know her. But this chick took way too many pictures of Queen Whorebag. There should NEVER be more pictures of her than of stuff people actually want to see, such as FCG. There is barely any Old Crush, and in the ones she's in, you can't even tell she has awesome boobs! What the hell!?
I just got back from FCG's play, and ooooh, do I have a story for you guys! This would ONLY happen to someone as awkward as me, I swear. You guys will like this. It's a little long, sure, but it is probably worth the read.
So, some people I knew said the might go but weren't entirely sure if they could or not. I needed to go, so I just went alone and picked a random seat near the back in case any of them showed up and wanted to join me. I didn't really care if they showed up or not because I was really only there to support FCG, but I decided to sit where I could easily be seen anyway.
A few minutes before the thing started, an old woman, presumably someone's grandmother, walked up to me. She was very, very polite, and she asked if I was saving any seats. I said no and that I could even scoot down a few seats if she needed me to. She smiled, said that wouldn't be necessary, and sat down next to me. Her husband and a few middle-aged adults followed. There were also three children with them. I couldn't help but notice that the little boy looked a little familiar, but I didn't really think anything of it. Suddenly, the grandmother began talking to me.