I'm really not. I keep leaving this screen open, blank, with nothing to write. I really should write something though. I checked in with my counselor today. It was cool. She's so nice. Um... I don't really have anything to write. Hello, weekend. I missed you.
I'm going to go play DS in my room now. Yeah. I've been working on art for way too long today. Bye guys. Sorry about my laziness.
I am a thinker and a feeler, according to my counselor. Gee, she's so wonderful. And she's right. I want to help people. I think that's what I want to do with my life. I really do...
I don't want to go to school.
I'm addicted to Colbie Caillat.
I feel like throwing up D:
I spent two whole hours talking to my counselor.
I'm not sure if I'm supposed to say more. But she is absolutely the most fantastic person ever X3 I showed her my ankle... And she said at the end "You know, I call parents 100% of the time when I know they're cutting themselves," *Shelby does a scared face* "But I'm not going to call for you. I have a feeling we can work this out without bringing it home."
Squeee! :D She's so fabulous. Chad, I bet the other counselor is just as awesome. You should see her sometime :)
What a day.
Let me repeat that... What. A. Day.
I'mma get a snack. Be right back. Don't have a heart attack ;D
Hmm. I probably shouldn't tell you guys this, because you'll freak out. But I feel I should write it anyways. It's in my head.
I always make excuses for myself. "Oh, I'm not an alchoholic. I just like a drink every now and then when I'm sad. Oh, I'm not an emo cutter. I just like to see the blood. I don't need to see a counselor, I'm fine."
Right now I'm drinking black coffee with a smidge of vanilla syrup in it. It's cold, burnt, and bitter tasting.
I'm also talking to T and my buddy Marcus. About boners. And jacking off. Interesting...
I feel like crying. Odd. I always end up talking about T and how I love him... To T himself. Argh.
For now, it's bedtime. I'll post when I wake up. Night people.
I have no time :C I slept in so I could feel better... So I'll write something later maybe. Ehh. We're doing high school registrations today. Scary! D: I'll talk to you guys laterrrrrrr <3
And I cum knowledge ._.
Ohohohohkay then! >.>;;
I feel funky. And rediculously happy. Remember what I said about my little sleep schedule= Great-ass mood? Yeah XD I didn't fall asleep until like OhgeeIdunnothreethirty AM.
I woke up at 5:30. And made an omelet with ham, green onions, and cheese. And smeared some cream cheese and cinnamon sugar on toast. And put orange juice into my amazing new tiger thermos. Yay.
Breakfast was dewiciousss.
We ask, we answer, we think
Does this happen to us?
Am I so incomplete?
I don't know what's wrong with me lately. I hope school wil fix it. I feel happy, but so suicidal or self-injur-y inside. It's weird. I don't get it. I don't understand.
Gee, I'm angsty lately. That was alot of fun though. I have the dreaded homework to tackle now! Oh noes! But I really feel like drawing.
Any ideas? I've been practicing humans ALOT. But I don't have any really good ideas to finish up on... :/
T, oh T, oh T, oh T, please please love me.
Drawing humans is hard. So is making decisions.
Rawrrrr. I am so... Happy today, and yet so conflicted. I'm not happy with my "friends" situation. It seems the "better" I get, the less friends I have. Whatthehell. Doesn't anybody like me for who I am? Not for who I promise to become?
Usually I get like six a day. Wtf? And I've been gone this whole time?
YAY SHELBY IS BACK
*dances by myself*
I missed you guys SO MUCH. You mean the world to me! :D
I spend the first two days KNITTING for my friend. Jeesus christ I made this scarf and it's AWESOME ^^
I came back early because the two passes we have to cross were gonna have a really bad storm and we had to beat ittttt
So I got home around 4AM D: <
I am very bitchy today O.o
Is it just me, or does it seem like smiles have gone out of style or something?
Nobody smiles anymore... Sigh...
Now I have to go pack... I don't wanna leave. I'll miss you guys while I'm gone....
Here I am, walking down this road
and baby, I dunno where it goes.
The road keeps on winding out of sight
And the sun keeps on burning way too bright
But it's gotta go to somewhere better than here
Anywhere is better than here...
Inch by inch, and mile by mile
This trip is taking quite a while
And the stress may be breaking my back;
But there's no way I'm going back
I've got to keep moving, must keep on
To discover the place where I must belong
And even if you say it's right here...
I'm almost positive it's nowhere near
I like poems. Hi.
My baby, my angel, my only love.
Givin to me from the gods above.
I'll keep her safe from dangers path.
Those between us will fear my wrath.
I'll never leave her side, right here.
A kiss from her my life's so clear.
A hug a kiss, were holding hands.
like in heaven but on these lands.
I'll hold her tight, I'll hold her dear.
I promise she won't shed a tear.
I'll love her till the day I die.
I'll make her happy at every sigh.
I try so hard to make her smile.
My love for her, I watch it pile.
But all I want is her to love me.
Gazing at her all I see.
I have a few observations to tell you guys about.
First off. I notice that I fall asleep with one hand between my legs. What? Weird...
I'm not sleeping good lately. It's annoying. I can't fall asleep, and then I oversleep. Rawr. Some nights I pass out, others I flip and turn (and end up on the bottom of my bed face-down) and it's really stressing me out more.
I'm being a bad member of this site. I've had nothing to write lately, and I've been jammed with homework so I can't comment...
Tonight was no exception. We went to the High School and my sister showed me around and we got papers and it was fun. I started crying though because they were all going "Running Start! Blah blah! It's free college! Blah blah blah! It'll be a great deal!" and all I heard was "Do this, do that, it's good for you, it'll be a challenge, have no life in high school, just get a job, get into college cuz we're not paying for your ass."